Snerd
by The High King of Dralk
Summary: When a few nerds discover how to actually enter the Medium, they promptly kill each other, start alchemising, and...making talking spoons?
1. Cake Asshole

You wake up in your room, today is your... wait, no, wrong story. Let's restart, shall we?

Skype Log:

**BS **\- Hey nerds, pick up the call

**JC** \- No I'm tired of your bullshit

**BS** \- Fine, this doesn't concern you anyway, this is mostly me trying to reach Nathan and Mark

**JC** \- Then start a new chat I keep getting messages when you type them in this chat

**BS** \- (^)

**JC** \- And seriously stop with the damn cake emoji

**BS** \- (^)

The Skype tone rings as this cake asshole tries to reach the other two morons who waste their time on this program with him.

Skype Call:

**BS **\- Hey guys, it launched today, and guess who is currently installing the game!

**NM **\- (The song "Guren No Yumiya" played at a very slow rate, with a very deep voice singing it)

**MC** \- Oh, you got yours too, wanna start the session while we wait for Jon and Nate?

**NM** \- I'm right here!

**BS** \- Shut up Nate! Yeah let's start up the game, who's gonna play server?

**MC** \- I'll be server, I don't trust you with my character's home

**NM **\- I wouldn't trust him with his own home.

**BS** \- That's a reasonable thing to say.

**NM** \- EIIIII!

**BS** \- WHAT THE HELL!

**NM** \- My dog just licked my armpit

**BS** \- You need to keep that dog in another room while you're on Skype

**BS** \- Mark, what's the session code?

**MC** \- It's R41N60WD4SH

**BS** \- HA! Really? Wow, you are such a little fag!

**MC** \- Hey I resent that!

**BS** \- I know, that's why I said it.

**Call Ended**

There, HERE is where we will begin our story. While those two set up their session, let's go into some exposition.

This story starts with a young man by the name of Brandon Samuels. Today you and your friends have just gotten the Homestuck Kickstarter Game, but more on that later, for now back to Brandon himself. Brandon is what you might call a "shut-in." Only going out to go to school or hangout with friends. Looks-wise, he is about 6 feet tall, and has a slight stubble growing out from under his chin, his face is a connect-the-dots of acne as most boys his age would look. His mat of dark brown hair is greasy most of the time due to him being to busy playing video games to get up, and shower.

**Skype Call:**

**BS **\- Alright Mark, hurry up

**MC **\- Fine, I'm working on it! Just calm down!

**BS **\- Maybe I'll calm down when I'm killing imps!

**MC **\- Alright, I'm connected. Where's the character, I just see you sitting in your chair.

**BS **\- Go to the game, not my Skype cam!

**MC **\- I'M LOOKING AT THE GAME TAB!

**BS **\- Fine, just deploy the machines

**MC** \- Alright there you go

Brandon hears a loud noise coming from the hall.

He goes to investigate to find an alchemiter in the unused room between his room and his brother's. "God Damn it," he exclaims, "Wait, why is this happening in here, shouldn't this be happening in the game?"

Skype Call:

**BS** \- What did you do?

**MC** \- I just did what you said and deployed the machine, why what happened?

**BS** \- It's in my would-be computer room, and guess who's not gonna get the computer version of Skype now?

**MC** \- What are you talking about, are you pranking me?

**BS** \- No, you literally destroyed my computer space, this sucks

**MC** \- An actual alchemiter has been deployed in your house and you are complaining about where it's located?

**BS** \- YES!

**MC** \- Wow, you need to get your priorities straight.

**BS** \- No, what I need is for you to deploy the cruxtruder in my living room, and the totem lathe in my mom's office, got it.

**MC** \- We have actually found what appears to be a working copy of Sburb, and you actually want to play it, and destroy our planet to become the God of a new one?

**BS** \- FUCK YEAH!

**MC** \- You are one seriously messed up guy

**BS** \- You bet your ass I am!

**Skype Call End**

As you continue on to the Cruxtruder, you begin to realize you have jack-shit to open it with, you're gonna have to convince Mark to go along with your idea. Or you could just throw something heavy off the let's do that.

**Skype Call:**

**MC** \- What are you doing?

**MC** \- Oh, you don't have your headset on, you can't hear me

**MC** \- Wait is that your nightstand?

**MC** \- Fuck! what is he doing?

**Skype Call End**

You stands triumphant like a mighty Spartan warrior standing over the defeated ruins of Persia. At least you're pretty sure that's how it happened. Now to go claim that Totem and convince Mark to deploy the Pre-Punched Card.

**Skype Call:**

**BS** \- Yeah, guess who's playing the game whether you like it or not!

**MC** \- Wow, you're serious about this. What is wrong with you?

**BS** \- What's wrong is I have a taste for adventure. A thirst to conquer the medium and a wish to obtain power and riches this world simply does not contain. Now I ask you do you want to sit in that chair and wait while this world ends, or do you wish to follow me to victory?

**MC** \- Wow, you actually sold it to me, let's do it!

**BS** \- Yes, PERSUASION FTW!

**MC** \- Not really the whole "Persuasion" thing just the whole "Not wanting to die" thing.

**BS** \- Still counts! Now deploy the Pre-Punched Card.

**MC** \- Alright, let's get started!

**Skype Call End**

Mark deploys the Pre-Punched Card neatly on your desk. You grab the card and the totem and make a mad dash down the stairs to the Totem Lathe in your mom's office. You push the card into its slot and pop the totem into its place. You press the big button to start the machine and let it go to work. Once the totem is complete being carved into a perfectly simetrical vase-shaped item, you place it on the Alchemiter and alchemise the shit out of that light blue vase.

As you feel your house shake and notice the windows dim, you realize you have entered The Medium.

**Skype Call:**

**BS** \- Dude, I'm in the medium.

**MC** \- Cool, so who are we connecting next?

**AR** \- Hey guys!

**BS** \- PERFECT!

**AR** \- What's perfect?

**MC** \- Alex do you have the kickstarter game?

**AR** \- Yeah why?

**BS** \- 'Cause you're joining our session, and I'm gonna be your server player, so let's get started.

**AR** \- Alright, what's the session code?

**MC** \- R41N60WD4SH.

**AR** \- Alright, I'm joining.

**BS** \- Okay, I can see you!

**AR** \- Wait... What do you mean see me?

**BS** \- Oh yeah, this is a working copy of Sburb, and I get free reign over your house. I also get 100 Grist to play with, let's get started!

**AR** \- Fuck!

**Skype Call End**

You proceed to install all the machines, and you make it a point to install all of them right in front of doors, but not blocking them completely. Just leaving enough room to squeeze between the Machines and the wall, but making it really awkward to squeeze past.

You give Alex his basic instructions and start making some "home improvements" Y'know, moving his door into the wall, Changing all of his stairs into steep ramps he can't climb up, the usual stuff.

You are going to have one fun session, that's for sure. But you still have a long way to go before you get to the end of this journey.

**END OF CHAPTER 1**


	2. Arson and Alchemy

Now time for another perspective on the totally stupidity that is this game.

Your name is Alex Rogers, you are a very strange fellow. Many of your friends secretly insult you behind your back, and sometimes directly in front of your face, but you don't give a shit. Your attention is to focused on you imminent plot to burn the entire world, but that can wait till later. You are the youngest among your friends, due to you having skipped a grade when you were younger, placing you a full year younger R than most of the others, and an almost two years to Brandon who is a year older than all the others. You suppose this age difference makes you common, and you often let him in on your arsonistic plots, fueled by both psycosis and jet fuel.

Speaking of Brandon and your shared plots to burn anything and everything, he's in a call with Mark. Let's see what their up to shall we?

We have already read this so, let's move on to what's happening now, shall we.

Now you are sliding down one of the fun slides that your server player has placed in your home, he has however left out the ability to go up the slides. You have been following his orders and have so far carved the totem and are proceeding to alchemise your "entry alchemy" as he calls it. As you enter the Medium you go to the Skype call check in with your co-players.

Skype Call:

AR - Okay, I'm in the Medium, what now?

BS - Did you pre-prototype your sprite like I said?

AR - Yeah, I tossed in a lighter I found.

BS - Why so much arson? Calm down dude.

AR - Why calm down when you can burn what makes you anxious?

BS - Wow, you just dodged around my request by turning it against me, well played!

AR - What did you prototype?

BS - I tossed in my dog, Dusty, and I can't find anything else to toss in. I mean, there's tons of stuff, it's just none of it seems right to match with the old boy. Nothing quite fits him.

AR - Why not something that would help with speaking, dogs can't really talk.

BS - No sprites become able to talk after their second prototyping. WAIT, I got it!

AR - What?

BS - YES, Tromdoge sprite!

AR - What?

BS - I tossed in my trombone and got my dog with a trombone bell sticking out of his stomach. He also holds the slide and mouthpiece like he's really playing it. He looks awesome.

AR - Sweet! What should I prototype?

BS - How should I know what you should prototype?

AR - I thought you might have some suggestions, that's all.

BS - Well, it's usually best of you prototype some type of guardian. Something like the remains of a relative, or a pet.

AR - Well, what about my bearded dragon?

BS - Yeah, that's a good one!

AR - Okay, I'll toss the little guy in the sprite

Skype Call End

You toss in your pet bearded dragon, Wyrmling. Brandon gave you the idea for the name. As you toss him in there is a large flash of light and the sprite changes shape. You've done it your'be created your new best friend and guide: Wyrmlighter sprite!

Skype Call:

BS - Dude that thing looks sweet, props to you my friend!

AR - What's the purpose of the sprites anyway?

BS - They serve as a guide on your journey. A shitty riddle-speaking, hard to understand guide, but a guide none the less.

AR - Wait, so I'm going to be guided by a floating, riddle-saying dragon?

BS - Yeah, pretty much.

AR - That sounds awesome!

BS - You know what else sounds awesome, the sweet rhythms of Trombdoge's musical magic. (Trombone part of the Darth Vader theme)

Skype Call End

You go to speak with your sprite to see what great wisdom he has for you.

"Hey Wrymlighter, what do you think I should do now?" You ask waiting anxiously for a reply.

"I cannot simply tell you what you must do next, you must find these things out for your self," He bellows in a deep voice, "If I were to simply tell what you must do then this game would be a short and unfulfilling quest. I will help you and guide you on your journey, but the answers to your questions I can only lead you to, not give you." You pretty much understand what he means,and you get that he can't help you completely.

"What answers will you be leading me to then?"

"Ones that you must obtain through hard work and perseverance. Answers that must be learned through experience, not simple teaching."

You realize that you're not going to get a straight answer from this asshole, so you decide to go back to the Skype call.

Skype Call:

AR - Hey I'm back!

JC - Why the fuck is Alex here?

BS - He's my client player. I need him here so I can relay orders to him.

JC - Wait, so if I join now he'd be my server player?

BS - Yes.

JC - No, I'm letting someone else join first!

BS - Dude, come on. I already told Nathan he can close the chain.

JC - Fine! I'll just get Jeremy to be his client player!

BS - You and I both know Jeremy will never willingly play this game with us.

JC - To bad for him! I'll trick him into playing it with us!

AR - How do you intend to do that?

JC - Shut up Alex! I'll find a way!

BS - Well good luck with that.

JC - Fuck you! This is gonna work!

JC left the call

AR - So... What now?

BS - Right now, we work on getting you to your first gate, and on to your planet.

AR - Wait! I get a planet?

BS - Yeah, we all get planets.

AR - Sweet!

Skype Call End

Right as he says this you hear a buzz from your phone, which is sitting on your desk. You notice it is a pop-up from an app you have never remembered having called: Sylladex.

Skype Call:

AR - Hey what's a Sylladex?

BS - Oh, good you got your Sylladex app!

AR - But what is it?

BS - It contains your Captachalogue, which is like your inventory; Your Strife Specibus which is the type of weapons you can use; As well as your Echeladder, your ranking system.

AR - What do I do with all of these?

BS - Well first I would recommend you allocate your Strife Specibus.

AR - What?

BS - Select your weapon.

AR - How do I do that?

BS - Click on "Strife Specibus"; Click "Options"; The click "Allocate Specibus"

AR - Okay... Wow, that's a lot of options!

BS - What type of weapon do you want?

AR - A sword!

BS - Then click the one that says: "Blade-kind"

AR - Okay, what did that do?

BS - You're now able to use swords. However you can only use swords.

AR - What did you pick?

BS - Rifle-kind. Yeah, my only weapon is this air-soft M16 I had sitting in the corner of my room.

AR - Lucky! I don't even have a weapon yet.

BS - I can help with that.

AR - How?

BS - I think I have this old foam sword lying around somewhere

AR - Great, I could use pretty much anything.

BS - Wait, did I deploy the Punch Designix?

AR - I don't think so.

BS - There we go, it's in the hallway!

AR - Why the hallway?

BS - It makes it hard for you to walk through the hall!

AR - Asshole!

BS - That's me!

AR - So what now?

BS - Put a card from your Sylladex into the slot on the machine. Now enter the following code: X37SD707

AR - It destroyed the card!

BS - Now repeat what you did with your first totem, but use the new card this time.

Skype Call End

You follow your server player's instructions and... YEAH YOU GOT THE SHITTY FOAM SWORD! While it sucks ass, you now have a weapon to kill shit with, VICTORY AT ITS FINEST!

Skype Call:

BS - Cool! Well you should get the basics of alchemy now, so let's get back to the gate!

AR - Okay, what do I need to do?

BS - Well it's more of a combined effort. I need you to find the dragon imps you've created and start slaying. Killing them will level you up on your Echeladder and supply me with Grist to build up the hous so you can reach the first gate. You'll also need the Grist for alchemy, so get slashin'!

END OF CHAPTER 2


	3. Tricking Some Asshole

Our story now takes us to a young midget, it's okay to for you to call him a midget because YOU are this young midget. You sit in your room which... You know what fuck describing things in paragraphs. He has Simi-brown/blonde hair, he wears glasses and he has a green jacket, he always wears that green jacket, I'm pretty sure he sleeps in it. He's around 4.10 back to intresting shit.

Skype Log:

JC - Jeremy click this link (link here)

JB - Why?

JC - Just click it!

JB - Oooookaaaaaay.

JC - Good!

JB - It says I need a code.

JC - It's R41N60WD4SH

JB - Why?

JC - Jeremy! just enter the code!

JB - Okay, God!

JC - Okay, are you connected?

JB - Yeah why?

JC - Now let me connect... Done!

JB - What?

JC - Okay can you see me?

JB - Yeah. What's this all about?

JC - Jeremy you're gonna play Sburb with us. You're already in the game, it's to late to quit!

JB - Fuck what's Sburb and what is it going to do to my computer?

JC - Well, it's not gonna do anything to your computer, but your house is a different story.

JB - WHAT! WHAT IS THIS GONNA DO TO MY HOUSE?

JC - No need to worry, it's just Alex is gonna wreck your shit.

JB - Wait, Alex is gonna do something to my house?

JC - Yeah, he is currently the overlord of your home. Sorry.

JB - How is he the overlord of my home?

JC - Well, the file I just made you download is a game that puts him in complete control of your house.

JB - You gave ALEX complete control over my home?

JC - Yeah, sorry about that. At least he's not my server player!

JB - Wow, fuck you!

JC - Oh, yeah meteors are gonna hit all our houses unless you start deploying those machines. Sooooooo...yeah.

JB - Crap, just crap.

JC - No, it's all true. If I were you I'd get ahold of Alex while I get connected to Nathan.

JB - CRAP!

Skype Call End

You decide it's time to connect to Nathan while he deploys shit in your home. Upon further thinking, you shouldn't have passed him off first. You're screwed now bud. Well let's just see how this chat between Jeremy and Alex is going.

Your name is Jeremy Barett, and you are currently talking to the asshole who has been put in control of your home.

Skype Call:

AR - Hey Jeremy.

JB - Crap!

AR - What?

JB - According to Jon you're my "server player" which means you have some kind of control over my house.

AR - Not just some control, complete control!

JB - CRAP!

AR - So Jon actually tricked you into playing the game with us?

JB - Yes!

AR - Well that sucks for you but, it's good for us in the long run.

JB - How so?

AR - Nate says we have no "required aspect players"

JB - What?

AR - Apparently we have no Time or Space players without either making someone give up their aspect or making others join the game.

JB - What is an aspect?

AR - You'd have to ask someone else about that.

JB - Well, if you don't know that, then what am I supposed to do?

AR - That I do know 'cause Brandon and I have already entered the Medium

JB - What?

AR - I'll explain as best I can.

Skype Call End

You've already read the conversation where the basics are explained. As well as you know the basics of what their doing: Deploy the machines, get the Totem, enter the Medium. So let's check in on Jon and Nate.

Skype Call:

JC - Hey, Nate, I'm in.

NM - Sweet! Let me connect and then close the chain.

JC - Just so you know I'm your server.

NM - Aw hell!

MC - Hey what did you want?

NM - We're ready to close the chain.

MC - Okay, let's get going.

Skype Call End

In order to save you the time of reading all this bullshit we'll just get to the important stuff. They all do what they need to and all prototype their sprites.

Jon prototypes his pet cat and his video games and gets: Chromeow Sprite. He selects the Spoon-type Specibus.

Nate prototypes a bowling pin and a jar of peanut-butter to get: Bowlingbutter Sprite. He selects the Staff-type Specibus.

Jeremy prototypes his T.V. and his science homework to Sprite. He selects the Pistol-type Specibus.

Mark prototypes his Rainbowdash plush and a steak knife to get: Rainbowslash Sprite. He selects the Controller-kind Specibus.

Oh yeah! Nate dropped Mark's toilet down his chimney. BACK TO THE STORY

END OF CHAPTER 3


	4. The Mage of Void

Now that you've gotten through that bullshit that was the useless and half-assed exposition I think you deserve a reward. I know! How about we introduce the character's Titles, I'm sure you've been asking yourself what they are.

Let's just go down the chain starting with Mark.

Mark Critch - Page of Space

Mark is the game's Space player, giving him dominion over all that has a physical form. While this is true about the Space aspect, he is limited by the Page class. A Page must earn their powers and greatness. However, if a Page can truly realize their potential, it is one of the most powerful classes.

Brandon Samuels - Heir of Doom

While this class may sound awesome, having the Doom aspect is not all it's cracked up to be. Doom players are not simply the bringers of destruction, they are also given the job of trying to use their abilities to help the party survive. Doom players have been reported to have prophetical visions of their co-player's being killed or injured. The Heir class simply implies that once he has died, Brandon must actually become Doom, he will have to be death and force others to their fates.

Alex Rogers - Mage of Void

While this one sounds awesome too, once again, this is one of the hardest roles to fulfill. Void players are responsible with creation, as well as destruction. While Void players give things their physical forms, they also must lead to the ultimate end of their creations, as they, like all things must return to the void; ashes to ashes, dust to dust. As for the Mage class, Mages are given magical power through their aspects, giving Alex a large amount of power, yet so little he may actually have. Void aspect is not fun.

Jeremy Barett - Seer of Time

Time players are able to travel through time, sounds cool, right? Well it's not all fun and games, Time players are very limited in their powers, as one mistake can lead to them landing in a doomed timeline. This is not a likely problem for Jeremy though because he has the Seer class. Seers are responsible for seeing the bigger picture, giving Jeremy the ability to tell what will force him in to a doomed timeline. Seers are also responsible for coordinating the efforts of their team, giving him essentially command of the operation.

Jonathan Cantry - Rogue of Breath

Jon has the Breath aspect giving him dominion over the wind. While this sounds cool it's also very limited. Breath players are powerful indeed, but they also have power only in places where they have room to use their power, otherwise they might hurt themselves in the process. However Jon is really powerful when this is combined with the Rogue class. Rogues both steal and give to others via their aspects meaning Jon can literally take people's breath away, and make them suffocate.

Nathan Maddison - Prince of Mind

As a Mind player Nate has the ability to use his mind to a much higher capability. Mind players often have some cool powers to boot, such as telekinesis, mind reading, and mind control in some extreme cases. Mind players will usually be able to use slight mind reading to understand how an enemy thinks and how they might attack. While there are many good things about the aspect there are also many drawbacks, letting yourself in to the mind of others isn't always good for one's mental health. The Prince class is for those who use their aspect to destroy things directly. Using their aspect to it's fullest power to wreck things.

With your reward for making it through the exposition out of the way, let's go back to Alex as he enters his first gate.

Skype Call:

BS - Well it's done you can go down to your planet now; but by down I mean up.

AR - What do I do?

BS - Climb to the highest floor I've built so far and hop through the portal.

AR - Sweet!

BS - WAIT! Before you go.

AR - What?

BS - I forgot to tell you about your consorts.

AR - My consorts?

BS - They're races of creatures who inhabit each planet. They are usually the favorite animal of the hero who goes with that planet. But there are a few exceptions.

AR - So, look for my favorite animal?

BS - Well, it's more like look for weird human-animal hybrids that live in towns.

AR - Got it!

Skype Call End

As you head up, you stop by the bathroom and get a good look at yourself in the mirror. You see your tall and slender figure. Your wide glasses act as frames for your almost useless eyes, seriously without those glasses it's all blur. Topping this all off is hair that is a mix of blonde and brown, mostly blonde.

You wash your hands and head up the new stairs your server has put in leading to new floors, yet unexplored. As you ascend the stairs you can hear imps have made your new floors their homes, better clear them out.

5 minutes later...

Well that takes care of that, now back to the portal. As you enter a room conveniently marked by a stack of PGO's (Perfectly Generic Objects) and a sign on the door reading: Portal 1 - Player Planet. You enter to find nothing in the room with the exception of a floating, spinning portal in the center of the room. You hop in.

As you drop onto the planet you first notice the ground is of hard stone. As you look around you see walls extending into long hallways in all directions. You clutch tightly to the necklace your sprite gave you, nice of the dragon to give you a quick way back. As you proceed through the maze twisting and turning as you grow more and more lost, you see something move out of the corner of your eye. You look, but see nothing there, you grow more frantic and pick up your pace hoping to escape your pursuer. As you turn the corner you see a larger opening the grounds peppered with large stone huts.

You look into the village to see several lizards moving around and talking with each other. These must be your consorts! As you begin to enter the village the shape that was following you leaps in your path.

"Who are you?" It screams in a scratchy and high-pitched voice.

"I'm Alex, who are you?" You reply with growing curiosity, yet minding you distance.

"I a this a member of this town's guard and you are entering this land without proper authority!" His voice rises and he begins to turn red as he grows angrier.

"I thought I was welcome here, I live up there," you gesture to your home floating high above the stone walls and clouds of this world.

"Oh! I am deeply sorry sir, it's just I did not take you for a Mage when I first saw you," He grew less red but continued to stay a nice hue of scarlet, showing his embarrassment.

"Mage?" You say confused and pondering what he meant.

"Well, yes you are the one who lives in that house yes?" He asked seeming to grow more and more confused.

"Well, yeah. I mean that is my house." You say still trying to wrap your head around his sudden change in attitude and formally addressing you as if you were of higher rank.

"Then you are the Mage of Void. You are our hero!" He became incredibly happy as he said this and his voice was loud as he said the word "hero."

"I am your hero?" You still had no idea what this strange fellow was talking about.

"Oh, I see! You have not realized your potential yet!" He sounded sad yet happy at the same time, the mix of finding you hero, yet realizing he knows nothing about being a hero. "Well," he continued, "Then I shall take you to our leader, King Grold!"

As he leads you through the town of, what you now understand to be chameleons, he shouted about how the Mage of Void had come at last. When the people heard this they began lining the streets cheering "Mage! Mage! Mage!" as you walked past.

"Hey what do you call this place?" You ask with honest wonder

"Well, this town is our capital of Bedrock. This planet is known as The Land of Rock and Claustraphobia." He answered as if he answered these questions frequently, "The palace is just ahead, inside is Grold."

As you enter the great stone palace you see that it is adorned with all types of precious stones and metal. The roof is a mosaic made of precious stones depicting a figure in a dark blue cape holding a sword. The sword is embedded in what appears to be a jet-black frog of immeasurable size in comparison to the warrior depicted.

"I see you enjoy our depictions of yourself." A golden, crowned chameleon says as he sits atop a jeweled throne.

"Of me?" You ask perplexed and also amazed

"Well, our oracle told us of the Mage of Void and how he shall save our land from Kek."

"So this will happened in the future?"

"Yes, however it will take you a long time and you must climb to the highest reaches of Skia to defeat Kek."

"How do I get started? Can you help?"

"Yes! Oh, I forgot to introduce myself I am King Grold!"

"Well, King Grold, how do I start?"

"Your journey starts here, but first, you must awaken. Luckily for you, that is something I can help with!"

END OF CHAPTER 4


	5. Snoop's Burrito Wonderland

We now go to Nate as he currently fucks up Mark's home.

Skype Log:

NM - I don't see the real problem here.

MC - The problem is that my toilet is down my chimney.

NM - How is this a problem?

MC - Maybe I actually wanted to be able to use the bathroom!

NM - Learn to hold it!

BS - Hold what?

MC - My bodily fluids!

BS - Nope, I'm out I'll call back later. Also, Alex is on his planet, bye nerds!

NM - I still stand by my statement!

MC - Fuck you! Maybe my consorts have toilets.

NM - Doubtful!

MC - You can eat an ENTIRE BUTT!

Skype Call End

As he stomps off up the stairs that YOU MADE FOR HIM! The joke is on him however, you didn't build up the stairs high enough to reach the first gate. You decide to check in with your server player to see about your own planet.

"Hey homie, whachu' doin?'" you hear in your head

"Oh shit! Are you my exile?" You say out loud, possibly making Jon wonder if you've gone crazy.

"Man, I like to go by Snoop Lion!"

"What? Snoop Dogg?"

"It's Snoop Lion to you!"

"Wait, how are you even my exile, Earth must have been destroyed for over 400 years by then!"

"Man, I don't know, I was at a party. I got really high. I woke up in this big-ass desert."

"Aw hell, I'm going to be guided by a Bowlingpin/Peanutbutter monstrosity and a 400 year old weed addict!"

"Hey man, I ain't addicted to nothin', I can stop any time I want!"

"Fine, then what do you think I should do?"

"Well, if I was you, I'd take care of that little guy tryin' to eat yo sink."

"FUCKING IMPS"

You go to your basement and retieve a metal pole off of your dad's exercise machine. This shall not stand, you've gone through to much bullshit already! You ascend to the kitchen and find an imp attempting to eat you sink, as if it were actually edible.

With one fatal swoop, you hit the little bastard square in the head with the pole. Teach him not to eat sinks!

You are now "Snoop Lion" who seems to be in a mobile, metal house. You are greatly displeased with the lack of weed, bottles, or bitches. You are a rap star and it is a crime against you that you are not knee deep in bitches by this point in the day. You, since you have nothing better to do, have been watching this fat kid beat those little motherfuckers with a pole for the past few minutes.

You get bored. Fuck this place, fuck this kid, you are off to search for bitches! As you look around you notice the little microwave in the corner. Fuck that red microwave, you tried to microwave a burrito an hour ago, it fucking dissapeared. You have no idea where the burrito went, or why you woke up with a microwave burrito in your back pocket. But God damn if you didn't want that sweet, sweet burrito.

This kid seems to know something about your situation, maybe you should ask him about it. Nope, he just beat some little fuck to death with a pole, you know when not to fuck with someone, this is that time! While that guy beats things to death like a little psychopath, you decide to explore your sweet new crib. You decide to go through a door to the right of where you were sitting, inside you find it... FUCK YEAH, THERE'S YOUR BURRITO! It was sitting on the table the whole time, while it's still cold, you don't care a burrito's a burrito.

SHIT! Maybe you should have heated up the burrito. You promptly spit it on the ground. One burrito down the drain, 15 more to go! As you make your way back up from the floor and the puddle of burrito and regret. You look closer at your surroundings. This room is pretty cool. There's a couch, a mini-kitchen, and a flat-screen. You decide to turn on the T.V. and pop one of your other burritos into the mini-kitchen's microwave.

As as you turn on the screen, you see the fat kid again, beating more things with a pole. You wonder if these little guys like being hit with that pole, why else would they keep coming? You hear the microwave ding and look gladly to see that your burrito is still there! As as you reach in to the microwave you feel the ground shake and a hear a large noise outside. Damnit! You dropped the burrito, you're getting tired of this bullshit!

You find the exit after five minutes of searching and head outside to teach this bitch not to get between you and your burritos! You find outside another large metal house, you cannot allows this. This is your property, under the grounds that you woke up here with a hangover and found nobody else there, so it's yours now! You see quite literally the whitest bitch in the world come out of the building.

"What are you looking at, you lowly swine?" She says in what you believe to be the most annoying voice you have ever heard. Imagine dragging nails across a chalk board. Now imagine that combined with a goat screeching.

"I'm looking at the bitch who made me drop my lunch!"

"WHAT did you call, me?"

"What'chu is, an ugly bitch"

"How dare you! I will have you know that I am a very wealthy and respected noble!"

"And I will have you know that I am a very wealthy and respected rapper!"

"Fine, just help me fix my ship and I will be on my way!"

"Uh, let me think about it. No. You made me drop the second burrito I have tried to make today, and I'm pretty fuckin' hungry!"

"I don't much care for your language!"

"An' I don't care for your stuck-up bitcheness!"

As you continue to argue you hear the sounds of explosions and can smell the most heinous of smells, AXE Bodyspray! As you both turn and cover your noses you see what appears to be a guy whose skin is actually the color black. He wields a belt of grenades and is so ripped you wonder where he found a shirt big enough to hold his biceps. Seriously, how can he even lift his arms?

As he approaches you notice something coming over the horizon...is that...OH FUCK IT IS! This asshole is being followed by a silver tank! You decide to duck inside of your new home for safety, you're not getting blown up today!

As he approaches you see him stop and speak to the bitch who messed up your burrito. After a short conversation he begins approaching your home and picks you up and carries you outside to talk.

"Now!" The hulking brute says in a deep voice. You sense slight irritation, "What seems to be the problem here?"

"I was insulted by this lowly buffoon when I asked for assistance!" The bitch with the screechy voice says.

"Maybe if you weren't such a huge piece of shit about it I would help you!" You say

"I think I see the problem here" the large man says, "You two simply got off on the wrong foot, that's all!"

As he observes you start over with the conversation and actually talk like civilized people. After you talk it out, she returns to her metal home to attempt repairs while you speak with the brute.

"So, why are you here?" You ask

"I simply wonder the vast deserts, I look for treasure, I defend the weak. It's just what I do!"

"That sounds kinda dumb actually. Why get all the bling when you can't spend it on shit?"

"I found very quickly that people in the desert will trade goods for anything shiny. It helps me provide for my friends back at camp."

"What camp?"

"Some of the others I have met have decided to join me, we live in an encampment not far from here."

As he says this you hear a roar of engines as the white chick's home begins to move. Once it lifts a few feet off the ground she pokes her head out.

"Got it to work!" She says with a self-satisfied look.

"Great," the living bicep says, "If you two want your welcome at our camp. I'm sure they'd love to have you!"

You figure it's probably your best shot of finding more food and water. Burritos are good, but they're no means of sustaining yourself for long periods of time.

"Alright, let's go!" You say as you get into your home and look for the on button.

After several minutes of searching and finally asking the large fellow for help, you get the ship moving and start heading for your new home.

END OF CHAPTER 5


	6. Those Two Assholes, And Their Exiles

We now go to the characters who haven't gotten enough attention, Jon and Jeremy!

Skype Call:

JB - So what now?

JC - Wow, I thought Brandon literally screamed this to everyone by now. You need to go to your first gate.

JB - Dude, I just muted Brandon when he started to yell at Alex for "being incompetent" and "fucking being an idiot."

JC - Well, he wants us all to build up our homes and get to our planets. Some bulsht like that.

JB - So why are we listening to that asshole in the first place?

JC - Because his "orders" are things we have to do anyway to progress.

JB - So, we're just doing it 'cause we have to?

JC - Yeah, pretty much.

JB - So, where is this "first gate"?

JC - It's up the fucking stairs Alex should have added to your home!

JB - So why did you call me?

JC - Because you haven't built up my house to the first gate!

JB - Oh, okay. I'll do that.

Skype Call End

You now understand why Brandon has taken to yelling at Mark and Alex more than usual. It's because these assholes are impossible to convince to accomplish anything.

As you walk to the stairs you heard being attached to your house(at least you hope they're stairs) you see your sprite eating out of his food bowl. Apparently while he may be half cat, half Chrom, he still needs to eat.

"Hey, Rogue!" You hear the voice in your head say

"What IS?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to my first gate. One of my teammates is being a huge bitch about us reaching our planets."

"Oh, the Land of Candy and Flight. It's been a long time since I've been."

"You've been to my planet?"

"Yeah, I was Prospitian soldier, as the name implies."

"Insubordinate Soldier?"

"Yes, that name."

"Why are you called that? You never told me."

"Well, my story is a short yet sad one. Would you like me to tell you?"

"Yeah, it's kinda why I asked!"

"It all started when I was deployed to The Battlefield," he said, his voice growing distant, "Me and my squad had never known a true battle before. We had always been sent on patrol missions. When we arrived we were deployed to the front lines. It was only later that I found that one of the consorts from your planet snuck onto the ship we boarded."

"My planet?"

"Yes, I was deployed in your planet before The Battlefield. Anyway, it was a child, to young to know where she was. We were told to retreat, but I went for the child. I couldn't leave a little kid in a warzone. Well, that went against my orders. When I returned to the camp with the kid I was discharged for insubordination and endangering a civilian."

"Wow, that sucks."

"I guess it's good that I became your exile."

"Why? Isn't it hard being an exile?"

"Well, that parts hard, but I meant that I became YOUR exile other than one of the other heroes."

"Why am I so important as a hero to you?"

"Because you're a Rogue, because your class shows compassion to others."

"How does my class make me compassionate?"

"A Rogue steals their aspect and gives it to those in need of it. You are required to help others to be effective. Perhaps you can help those I could not, perhaps you can save those who lost their lives on The Battlefield."

"Whoa dude, that's deep, but I don't know if I can do much, I mean, it's not like I'm the Rogue of Life or Doom."

"But you are the Rogue of Breath, you can give Breath to others, and Breath is just as good as Life in this situation. I have to go now, SG is back, good luck Jon!"

As you head up the stairs you think about what he said. Can you really bring people back to life. That would be pretty awesome! Aw, fuck! Brandon's calling you, ignore this bullshit!

As you ascend the stairs you notice that Jeremy has actually learned how to build shit now! You reach the first gate and hop in!

We now go to Jeremy as he talks to HIS server player, Alex.

Skype Call:

JB - Alright, so where do I go?

AR - Up the stairs in your hallway.

JB - Who puts stairs in the hallway?

AR - It seemed to fit perfectly.

JB - So? That doesn't make it any less difficult to walk through a flight of stairs!

AR - Hey, fuck off!

JB - Why? You've fucked up my house!

AR - Just get to your planet, I'm going to wake up.

JB - Wake up?

AR - It will make sense later, just go!

Skype Call End

As you ascend your hall-stairs you enter a room, neatly labeled "First Gate". As you enter you notice a small spinning portal in the room. Fuck it, jump in!

You emerge in a large forest, covering for as far as you can see are bushes and trees. You wonder along noticing bubbles float off above your head, huge bubbles, bubbles the size of fucking mountains! Wow, guess what land this is! If you said Land of Bubbles and Undergrowth, you would be fucking right! What, do you want a medal? Well you don't get one so fuck off!

As you walk further into your forested land of bullshit, you hear a faint sound in the distance. Is that chanting? It IS chanting, but what could be chanting out here?

You head forward to see a group of dogs huddled around a campfire. If one catches on fire it is not going to surprise you when the whole fucking forest goes up with him. Maybe the bubbles will put it out, doubtful.

This is bullshit as a planet, so you promptly take the thing your T.V. gave you and go back home. You're not burning today, Alex can enjoy your planet's free kindling.

"Kid!" You hear a voice in your head. Great now you're going crazy too.

"Who are you? And why are you in my head?"

"I'm your exile!"

"What's an exile?"

"Well as one of my fellow exiles put it 'We are here to guide the heroes.' Or something along those lines."

"So I'm some kind of hero?"

"You're not just some hero, you're the Seer of Time!"

"Seer of Time, that sounds really stupid!"

"Well, it's not, so shut up you ungrateful little shit!"

"Then what can I do?"

"Well as Seer implies, you can see the general flow and course of time, also you can time travel."

"YES! Time travel was all I wanted to hear, I'm in!"

"Well then, good luck with that, I was just here to convince you to keep playing the game."

With your new understanding that you get time travel, you're finally ready to tackle this bullshit of a game!

END OF CHAPTER 6


	7. The Prince of Mind

We now go to the Prince of Mind as he beats shit with a metal pole. He has been running around killing things, which doesn't help his asthma. He has never had an asthma attack though because, you could tell by looking at him, he never runs, ever. He has dropped his glasses on several occasions and has gotten an ungodly amount of grist and risen up his Echeladder a great deal.

You are now in his perspective, meaning you now cannot see his black hair, or anything without his glasses for that matter. Well you can see things, just not well, only Alex is completely blind without his glasses.

As you climb to the first gate you hear the sound of someone calling you. $10 says it's either Mark or Brandon. Well $10 was right, it's Mark.

Skype Call:

MC - Hey Nathan!

NM - What Mark?

MC - Have you woken up yet?

NM - No! What, have you actually woken up already?

MC - Yeah, me and Alex have.

NM - First of all, what the fuck! Second of all, how have you possibly woken up already? We've been here for maybe 3 hours at most.

MC - Well, I just got knocked out by my toilet, which somehow ended up over my door-frame!

NM - HA!

MC - And Alex says he got his consorts to help him.

NM - Are they already going down to their planets?

MC - Yeah, you and I are the only ones who haven't gone down yet. It's part of some stupid thing where Brandon is trying to get all the gates available as fast as possible.

NM - Why?

MC - He said something about getting "sick loot" and when I asked him about it he said he was trying to God-tier as fast as possible. I think he just wants the immortality.

NM - Joke's on him, as soon as he dies when he God-tiers, it's going to be a just death, he is a huge asshole and will deserve it.

MC - So have you heard from your exile?

NM - Yeah, and for some reason mine is Snoop Dogg.

MC - What?

NM - Yeah, I have Snoop Dogg in my head!

MC - Well, I haven't heard from mine.

NM - I'm going to my planet now, you want me to build up your house first?

MC - No, I'll just play video games until you get back. I think the land of Conflict and Claustraphobia can last without me.

NM - I feel like using those websites to find out all of out planets and titles was kinda cheating.

MC - Well, it's too late now.

NM - Well, yeah.

MC - Well, I'll just let you get down to your planet, good luck dude!

NM - I'm gonna SLAY so many things on that planet!

Skype Call End

With that call over you decide to just go ahead and hop into the portal, as David Tennant would say: Geronimo!

You land atop a large flat area, as you step the ground beneath you vibrates and emits small sounds. You reach the edge of this large plateau you look down to find you are standing on a huge drum. This makes sense to you, as your planet is The Land of Conflict and Melody. This land is made of a solid ground and its land forms seem to be large instruments

You look down to see a small town nestled against the side of the giant drum. There appears to be a path to your right leading down the side of the drum, you hope it leads to the village. It does.

The town is quite small from first glance but you look up to see that there is more to the town build along the side of the drum. As you walk into the town you see that its populace is made entirely of red pandas, dank! You know full well the darkness of this village even if others do not. The dank levels of this village are well over 9,000.

You walk in to the village to be greeted by a happy red panda. "Greetings, young Prince!" The cat-bear says happily.

"Hey, are you one of my consorts?"

"Consorts? Do you mean ones native to this planet?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Yes!"

"Cool, I guess I should find your leader or something."

"I can take you to this town's mayor if that is what you mean."

"Yes! Let's do that!"

You follow the small and helpful creature. He leads you up several rope bridges to the very top of the buildings clinging to the drum. Once you reach the top you are lead inside of a large building adorned with the Mind symbol on the door. As you enter you are greeted by the sounds of shock and disbelief. You hear things like "The Prince!" and "He's here!".

An overpowering voice yells into the screams and cheers for the hero, "SILEEEEENCE". The voice comes from a single red panda sitting at the center of the room. He is quite small, as a red panda would be, making his incredible booming voice that much more surprising. "Greetings Prince of Mind!" He says breaking the silence he created.

"Hey."

"Why have you come to our humble town?"

"It's just the closest one to the portal."

"Yes, I can understand that, but why have you come to meet with our city council."

"Well, from what I can tell you might be able to help me wake up."

"What gave you that idea?"

"Well, Ale- I mean the Mage got help from his consorts."

"Well, I am sorry but waking up is not something we of this village know much about."

"If you can't help me wake up do you have any things that might help me on my journey?"

"We might have some weapons you could have."

"Cool! Got any staves?"

"Of course we have staves, do we look like a people who don't have use for staves?"

"Actually, yes, but I'd still like a staff."

You are led to a large room filled with containers. This appears to be an armory. You make your way to a container labled "Staves" and pick out a sweet looking wooden staff. The top is bent into a hook and it has a metal plating on both ends to add extra force to each hit. You are going to wreck shit with this dank ass weapon.

You return home to talk once again to Mark as he is seemingly building up Brandon's house.

Skype Call:

NM - Hey, Mark!

MC - Yeah?

NM - I got a cool staff, but they couldn't help me wake up.

MC - Well, at least you got something!

BS - Okay, build up to the second gate, Mark!

MC - You already need to reach the second gate?

NM - Dude, how quickly are you progressing?

BS - I am trying to climb my Echeladder as fast as possible. I want to God-tier.

MC - Wow, you really like the idea of immortality, don't you?

BS - Damn right! I also want powers over Doom!

AR - Hey guys!

NM - Hey, Alex.

BS - What now?

AR - I need to know how to upgrade my weapon.

MC - Just kinda combine it with something.

AR - Like what?

BS - I would recommend a lighter. You have tons lying around, and you will probably get a fire sword!

NM - Hey, Alex, what planet do you dream on?

AR - What do you mean?

NM - When you woke up was everything purple or yellow?

AR - Purple.

NM - Then you're a Derse dreamer, I kinda expected that actually.

BS - Well, we know that Me, Jon, and Alex are Derse dreamers; Nate is a Prospit dreamer; Prospit has three moons. Therefore I can just kinda guess and say that Jeremy and Mark are Prospit dreamers as well.

NM - Aww, I have to share Prospit with pony trash!

MC - I resent that!

BS - Shut up, pony trash!

AR - Okay, so how do I combine them?

BS - Put the foam sword in a card, punch the code, punch in the code for the lighter on the same card, and use the double-punched-card to make a totem.

AR - Okay, I think I get this alchemy thing now!

Skype Call End

You are now Brandon and you yourself have been getting into alchemy while this chat was going on. You find it necessary to make a mobile device that you can use to talk with the others while on the move. You decided to combine your Xbox One and Denim Jacket. To make: The Denimbox One! It's pretty much your jacket with the ability to pull up a screen so you can use Skype and play games. You fucked up and destroyed your Xbox in the process, so you decided to make a new one. Sadly the thing costs a completely ridiculous amount of grist and comes with some accessories you didn't want in the first place.

Skype Call:

BS - I have fused my jacket and Xbox

AR - WHY WOULD YOU RUIN THE CRACKET?

NM - Dude, chill! But seriously, why the cracket?

BS - 'Cause I'm one of the two in this session that doesn't own a pair of glasses.

MC - But the cracket dude!

BS - You guys know it looks the exact same as th original cracket right?

AR - Oh, okay.

NM - Hey, what time is it?

BS - 8:30 why, still gotta leave?

NM - Yeah!

AR - We're in an alternate world and you still have a set time to get off the computer?

NM - Yeah! My dad does not fuck around!

MC - Yeah, it is getting late, we need to rest if we want to survive this game.

BS - You guys can rest, but I'm going to stay up a while longer and climb some more rungs

AR - Yeah, I'm not really tired either.

NM - You guys do that, but I'm the host so I'm ending the call.

Skype Call End

As you and Alex begin making more progress as the others sleep, you can feel something come over you, a strange force you can't quite describe. As your vision goes black you feel your body become lighter, and you finally sink into the darkness.

END OF CHAPTER 7


	8. A Warrior's Heart

"Ah, so you've finally arrived!" A strange voice says. You don't recognize the voice or the image played out before you. You see you and your friends, weapons raised, facing an angel wielding a sword.

"Sadly, you are weak and must fall!" The Angel says as an evil smile stretches across his face. He swings his sword, most of the team ducks, Alex raises a flaming blade to block the strike, but Jon is to late. The blade slices through his chest and he falls to the ground bleeding profusely.

"Ha!" The Angel lets out slight chuckle as Jon bleeds, "See? You are weak creatures, humans. This is why you must die by my hand!"

"He's dead, there's no point in trying to help him up" you say in a tone that shocks you, a mixture of anger and apathy. You seem unsurprised by the event, almost as if you saw it coming from a mile away.

"But his dream self is dead!" Mark yells, "How are we supposed to win if we let him die?"

"I know that, but we have more pressing matters at hand!" You say with the same serious expression on your face.

You jump awake. What was that? Was that a dream? Did you fall asleep?

"Hey, Brandon, get up!" It's your brother, he looks down at you with anger in his eyes.

"Shit! What do you want, Duncan?" You ask still half asleep.

"Oh, nothing! I just want to know why, when I tried to go to work yesterday, there was a great black void where the street used to be!"

"Oh. That. Well, it's a long story."

"And you've got a short life span if you don't get started on it."

You explain to your brother how you got here, who else is here, and how to get out.

"So you're telling me that only you and your little friends can get us out of here?"

"Yes!"

"God, I fuckin' hate you!"

"Well, sorry, but at least you don't have to work anymore!"

"That is an up side! So, aren't you going to need a better weapon than that air-soft gun?"

"Yeah! Why do you have one?"

"No, but I know where dad keeps the assault rifle, the really big one madré got mad at him for buying."

"Sweet!"

"Come on, it's in the basement!"

You follow your brother to the basement and he leads you to your father's office. He removes some junk in the corner to reveal an assault rifle your dad bought one year ago.

"Be careful with that thing!" Duncan warns.

"Relax, I'm going to be using it to save the world!"

"You already destroyed the world!"

"I meant this world!"

"Yeah, that's so useful to us!"

"Hey, do you want to be invited to the new universe or not?"

"Fine! Now get out there and kick some ass!" He raises his hand and you put the rifle over your right shoulder and high-five him with your left hand as you exit the basement.

Skype Chat:

BS - Alright! Report! Who's up?

JB - Me

MC - I'm up to

BS - Is that it?

JB - Yeah I think so

BS - Well then we need to get down to buisness!

MC - What buisness

BS - We need to work on getting better equipped!

BS - I already have an assault rifle and Alex got his fire sword, but we need to get down to buisness!

MC - I think I have an idea!

BS - What?

MC - uRoBoRoS

BS - Fuck no!

MC - But we could make free zillium and I won't make the other one!

BS - No!

MC - I'm doing it!

JB - What is he doing to fuck is up?

BS - The item created with that code is a juju, a powerful magical item with immeasurable power when combined with another juju with an incredibly similar code.

JB - That sounds awesome!

BS - It's not, it's the equivalent to magic space drugs that make you so fucking happy and colorful but with one hell of a hangover.

JB - What's wrong with that other than the hangover?

BS - It makes you one of those people who are too happy all the time.

JB - Fuck!

MC - Hey, it will be fine. I'm only gonna make the one juju!

BS - But what if you lose the card, and put the wrong code in when you go to replace the card?

MC - How would you know what's gonna happen in the future!

BS - BITCH! I am a Doom player, it's my fucking job to see into the future and tell when you're gonna fuck up!

MC - You haven't even God-tiered! How could you possibly have your powers yet, have you had a vision?

BS - No! I haven't seen anything yet but I know damn well that you will fuck this up!

JB - You said no like you really have seen something, what is it Brandon?

BS - I haven't seen anything!

MC - Brandon! What did you see, we need to know!

BS - Fuck! Fine, I'll tell you. Jon's gonna die.

MC - What! You saw one of our friends die and you didn't find it necessary to tell the rest of the team immediatly?

BS - I fell asleep, I didn't know if it was a vision or not.

MC - You still should have told us!

BS - Look, just don't tell the others, especially not Jon. If he knows he's gonna die, then he might not be willing to keep playing.

JB - Wait, we know he's gonna die and we aren't going to tell him!

BS - How would you react if you were told you were gonna die by one of your friends?

JB - Good point. So what, how are we gonna prevent his death?

BS - First things first we need an alternative way to revive people as their dream selves, unless one of you likes the idea of kissing our co-player's corpses.

MC - No, nobody does.

BS - Then I will work on keeping the team alive, so I'll work on the new revival method.

JB - What should we do?

BS - Mark, I want you to build up my house more so I can reach the second gate. Jeremy, you're going to be keeping an eye on Jon, try to prevent his death, we need his dream-self. Now let's get to work.

Skype Call End

You all set out to complete these tasks. For now let's go to your fiery-headed older brother, Duncan.

You our are now Duncan Samuels. Your brother's stupid bullshit has pulled you into this shit-hole he calls "The Medium," because he has to work on getting everyone out of here and to a new home, you have decided you will provide for the family. He told you about his "player planet" the fact that he gets his own planet is bullshit. You did however take note of the fact that this planet has inhabitants called "consorts", and where there are living things, there is food.

You head up a set of stairs you were quite sure we're not there the day before. You walk up and up until you reach a room labeled: First Gate. You hop into the portal, because fucking YOLO! You step out onto the planet to be greeted by the great boom of thunder. The world is illuminated by great streaks of lightning and the faint glow of thousands upon thousands of stars, all clumped together tightly covering the entire, vast sky. You have made it to your brother's planet: The Land of Thunder and Starlight.

You walk along a road that starts at the portal for about twenty minutes and arrive in a large, walled city. As you walk into the great city in search of food for you and your parents. As you walk in you are greeted as a hero. The snakes who line the streets yell and cheer, a greeting you believe they were supposed to give Brandon as he is the patron hero of this land, but they seem just as amazed and ecstatic because of your arrival.

"The Knight! The Knight has come!" They chant. You are no knight, you don't know how they got this idea in their heads.

What you don't fully know yet is that Sburb is a game of bendable rules. No session of the game has EVER followed every rule to the letter. Some sessions have to scratch and start another session in order to win. Some, have all their sprites die and enter a Void Session. Some of the very, very unfortunate few try to play the game with only one person and enter a Dead Session.

The he simple fact of the matter is that the rules governing this world are about as useful as a poopy flavored lollipop. With the rules being so flexible, this session is no exemption from something being unsuspected. This session's first abnormality is an unexpected seventh player. You, Duncan are that seventh player and you will learn your destiny now. Duncan Samuels is the Knight of Heart.

END OF CHAPTER 8


	9. The Rouge of Breath

With our shocking twist that Duncan had been a player in the session we now head to the home of Jon. You are now Jon, you have been awakened by your mother. What bullshit now?

"Jonathan, it's Sunday!" She says.

"Mom, were in the Medium, there are no churches here to go to."

"Then I'll build one! I shall bring God to these heretics!"

"Mom, do not force Christ on my consorts!"

"Your consorts? So YOU have turned them away from the teachings of Jesus?"

"No, mom. They never believed in Jesus. This isn't Earth. They have never heard of Jesus or any of his teachings."

"Then I shall teach them of Jesus and his teachings!"

"No mom, you will not corrupt my consorts by forcing your religion on people! If you honestly just kindly asked them if they would like to hear about Christianity, it wouldn't be a problem, but I know you are instead going to call the sinners and hit them with bibles and shit!"

"Watch your language!"

"Yes mother, I will watch my language, I'm only going to create a world, and become a literal God."

"See, you get immortality, by a clear gift from Jesus, and begin to turn your back on Christ!"

"Mom, if you want to convert people to your religion go ahead and convert the imps, but don't mess with my innocent consorts!"

"Good idea, those monsters clearly need Jesus!" With that she heads out on to your planet to convert imps to Christianity.

As you begin to go up the stairs yourself to enter the portal and meet with your innocent consorts, whom you have just saved from a life of Sunday sermons. You step out upon the minty ground of your sweet planet (LOL sweet). You have headed down to your planet: The Land of Candy and Flight.

Oh god, she actually did it. She built a fucking church in the night. You must both commend her on the effort and be dissapointed for taking the time build an entire church out of licorice trees. How the fuck did she even build a stable structure out of fucking licorice?

You leave your mother to her licorice house of the lord. You enter into the great city that lies beyond the great candy cathedral. The walls of stone are clearly obtained from Alex's planet in their many trades for materials. The people of LORAC trade the people of LOCAF for food and they get precious materials in return.

You are greeted by a lone elephant shrew standing guard. You take a closer look at that snout. As you get a closer look at that snout you hear the song Amazing Grace from behind you. You head on in to the city, you are always welcome here. You have been spending most of your time hanging out with your consorts.

You our walk along the street and find a restaurant and choose it as the place where you will have your breakfast. You need food and because these people serve only candy you quite enjoy their "fine dining." You are often forbidden the consumption of such sweet goods. However with your whole planet being made of candy, it's kinda hard for your mother to stop you.

"Greetings, Rouge!" A government official, who was hastily assigned to lead you around the city yesterday, says.

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Well, the King would like to see you."

"What does King Archibald want?"

"He needs your assistance with a slight matter."

"Okay, let's go see him."

You walk through the streets, the people of your planet have grown more accustomed to you being here after the first day. It seems that the arrival of a long awaited hero who you knew was coming is kind of like a candle that burns twice as bright, and half as long.

As you approach the great palace of chocolate bricks, you wait as the bridge lowers over the great moat of hot, chocolatey milk. The castle interior is not quite as extravagant as the outer view. The walls are beginning to melt and crumble around the people who live here. Repairs are constantly being made and you wonder if they will ever actually make any progress, or if they even care.

"Ah! Rouge, you have come!"

"Yeah, what's the problem?"

"You know that we trade with the people of LORAC for precious metals, correct?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure you mentioned it."

"Well, recently a large monster has decided to set up shop at our loading bay."

"Well, where is this loading bay?"

"It's in close orbit around LOCAF, we have a way to get you there."

"How did this monster even get in orbit in the first place?"

"It could have been any number of reasons, from Taranis's evil plans to foul play."

"So how do I get to this loading bay?"

"We're gonna launch you into space."

"So, I'm going to be put on a space station orbiting the planet to go kill a large monster on said space station?"

"Yes, that's the gist of it."

"Alright, let's do this!"

END OF CHAPTER 9

Hey, are you out there? Is anyone out there? Dad...if you can hear me, why...why did you do it? Why did you kill them? Did you have to kill them? I guess I'll find out. I'll find answers myself. You may not want me to discover these answers. You probably didn't even intend for me to find you...but I needed to know...I needed to know if you really are still out there, if you are still alive, I guess I was just chasing fantasies. Stupid, stupid fantasies. If you are out there, Dad, we'll come find you, we'll get answers. If I can't get answers, then I guess I'll get vengance. Cherry, signing off...


	10. It Only Gets Danker From Here

We now go to a certain Prince once again. If you were hoping Jeremy might get some attention, then you were fucking wrong, we'll get to him later.

You have just welcomed two assholes into your home. By which I mean Brandon and Mark are here.

"Hey, where's your second gate?" Brandon asks without even acknowledging that he is in your home, which is infested with imps. As if the imps were not something you need to get rid of.

"Dude, it's up the stairs. Now can you help me kill these fucking imps?" You respond

"Nope, got places to be, you can join us if you want."

"Where are you going?"

"We're going to Jon's planet" replies Mark, another who isn't gonna help with the imp issue.

"Why would I need to go to Jon's planet?" You respond.

"Shit's going down," Brandon says, "and from what we have gathered, he's gonna go fight a big fucking monster. You in?"

"Big monster fight, or killing hundreds of imps?" You ponder your situation, "Yeah, let's go."

With that you three head up to your second gate. You emerge in Jon's house and head up the stairs that clearly don't belong there until you reach the second gate. You hop in.

You our three all approach the walled city that Jon was in last chapter. Oh...my...God...his planet, it's...it's...ENCREDIBLY DANK! His consorts are elephant shrews, fucking elephant shrews. This is a clear challenge to your own planet's dankness by the great lord of dank in the sky. You will prove to them that when the going gets dank, the dank increases.

As you three walk through the dank land of candy and flight you see Jon being led by sharply dressed elephant shrew, sharp AND dank, a deadly combination! You promptly all run up to him. While the other two seem occupied trying to convince the shrew to let you help on the mission, you are questioning Jon on how he could find something so dank and not inform you of it. After several minutes of arguing the others have gotten you all a free trip on their favorite rocket ship, and you realize that Jon simply had no idea the dank levels of his planet. So with the situation under control you all head to the launch site.

"Whoa!" Brandon exclaims, "That's pretty well done for a bunch of elephant shrews!"

"Don't insult the ingenuity of my consorts, Brandon!" Jon says, glaring at Brandon for the insult to his people.

"I don't understand how they got the necessary stuff to build a rocket!" Mark observes

"Well," the sharp shrew explains, "we trade for supplies with LORAC. With the trade we get fuel and metals to keep the place running."

"How did you trade with them in the first place?" You ask.

"Back then the people of LOTAS were much kinder and more open to the world around them," sharp shrew says sadly, "they were much more advanced than us at the time and had metal and fuel galore. Sadly times have not been kind to them."

"Yeah, I noticed," Brandon replies, "they have trouble growing crops, and outside contact is forbidden by royal decree. If they could trade fuel for food, it would be a win-win, but that's not happening any time soon."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" You respond to this long-winded talk.

"It's just history lessons," Brandon replies, "I'm talking about the current government of my planet."

"How could you possibly know that much about your planet?" You sense the bullshit.

"My people transfer knowledge in a strange way," he explains terribly, "because snakes don't have hands, they learned to use telepathy and telekinesis to survive as a civilization. If you want knowledge from them, they can just put it in your brain."

"That actually sounds pretty cool" Mark chimes in.

"I hate to interrupt," a shrew working the computers says, "but we're ready for launch, you four should get on the shuttle."

"Let's go nerds!" You say.

"Alright, let's go kill a monster in space!" Jon adds.

You all walk along a long elevated catwalk into the rocket. As you cross Brandon clings very tightly to the rail and refuses to look down, afraid of heights you guess. While entering the shuttle you see a tall man, about the age of twenty, crossing the bridge. He boards the shuttle with you. Who is he?

"Hey, Duncan." Brandon says.

"Who's he?" Jon asks.

"He's my older brother." Brandon replies simply.

"Yeah, the snake people told me to come here and help," Duncan adds, "they said it was my 'knightly duty'."

"What 'knightly duty'? You aren't a Knight!" Mark says

"Actually, I am," Duncan retorts, "I am the Knight of Heart, and you can shut the fuck up!"

The countdown starts. "Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Launch!" An extatic shrew chants into a microphone. You feel the ground shake and hear a great rumble. As you shoot up into the sky you can feel the force of gravity pulling against you in an ill-fated attempt to pull you back to the ground. You finally break free of the atmosphere and look out of the small circular window. You look out to the black void that is the Medium, the only light being the glow of cities on planets and the thousands of tiny stars that orbit Brandon's planet.

The station is fairly large. You begin to get closer in preparation for docking. As you dock Duncan looks over the four of you and says, "Alright, listen, because it's an incredibly stupid idea to let four kids handle this by themselves, I'm here. You four idiots are going to stick with me. Any deviation from this plan will be met with an ass-kicking. Any arguments?"

None of you have any verbal arguments, due to the fact that when he said he would kick your ass, he looks like he could pull off kicking all your asses at once. You should not cross this man if you value your unkicked ass.

"So," you direct your question at Duncan, "what's your Strife Specibus?"

"Fist-Kind" he answers. This motherfucker actually has fist-kind Specibus, the only person in the web-comic to pull off that Specibus was Equius, and Equius had the strength of the Hulk in a teenager's body. What is this guy, and how strong is he really with that Specibus, you would ask Brandon, but he seemed to grow pale when Duncan said the words "fist-kind" a clear sign that he is quite powerful and Brandon has been the target of that force before.

You dock on the station and you begin to hear the alarm blaring through the station. Among the alarm you hear a femal voice saying "Remain calm. Retreat to the station's safe room. Remain calm." Then you hear the hiss of the air-lock as it opens and you enter the station.

END OF CHAPTER 10

Hey, dad. Cherry said that I should give you the benefit of the doubt when we find you. Sadly, I'm not my sister, when we find you, if you don't have a good reason for killing them. I will end you. Whether you are my father or not, your crimes are unforgivable, and you WILL be punished. Cherry may hate me for it, but that's just something I'm willing to live with. Goodbye, father...


	11. Duncan And The Minotaur

You are now Mark Critch. Shit has already started going down on this space station. As soon as that damn door opened you heard a loud fucking roar. You don't trust this shit, but at the very least your team's newly found Knight might be helpful. By helpful, I of course mean, useful as a distraction for when you need to run.

"Alright, let's go kick some ass!" Duncan yells as he picks up Brandon and throws him through the door leading to where the roar came from.

"Wait," Nathan interrupts "did you just throw your brother through a doorway toward what is most likely death?"

"Yes." Duncan replies coldly.

Holy shit! This guy is cold, you know when not to fuck with someone, for this man, it's 24/7.

"I am ok!" Brandon yells from behind the door.

"Good," Duncan says as he enters the now declared safe room.

As you enter the room behind Duncan you arrive just in time for Brandon to get up, then promptly get thrown into the next room by his brother. This process continues until you all reach about the twentieth room. Once you reached this room Duncan reached to lift Brandon, however Brandon promptly hit his brother in the face and fled. He's dead.

"What the FUCK did you just do to me?" Duncan yelled at his brother.

"No," Brandon exclaims, "you're not tossing me in that room, the monster's in there!"

"Then say so!"

"How would you react if you were about to be thrown into a room with a giant monster?"

"Fine! I'll give you that one."

With the revelation that the target is in the next room Duncan stands tall and walks straight into the room, no delay, no fear, he just walked right in.

You follow him into the room to find yourselves face to face with a Minotaur, that's right a giant, ten foot, fucking Minotaur. The great beast stares down at the five of you intently. It takes perticular intrest in Jon, apparently it finds midgets with glasses especially delicious.

"So, this ugly thing is why we're here?" Duncan asks rhetorically.

"Yeah," Brandon answers, "this would be the reason you threw me through doors."

"Well then, I think we should go ahead and kill it!" Duncan adds.

"You don't honestly think we can just kill that thing with no plan!" You interject.

"Yeah, that thing is pretty tough looking." Jon adds to the argument.

"This sounds like a great plan to me!" Brandon adds, not helping!

"We're already here, what else are we gonna do? Run back to the ship and tell those dank shrews that we chickened out?" Nathan supports the two psychos.

Before the team can argue this further the Minotaur sees his change and takes a large swipe at the team. You all duck to avoid the attack. All of you but Duncan. Duncan jumps, mounts the monster's arm and charges toward its face. He lands a single, bone shattering blow to the monster's bull nose. The Minotaur recoils in pain, bright red liquid falling from his nose. This motherfucker actually just punched a ten foot Minotaur, and made it bleed!

As the monster attempts to regain its balance, Brandon starts firing bursts of lead in its direction, this is your chance! You pull out your controller and enter a code. The team begins to flow with power, their weapons will now work at double the damage output. You quickly enter one more code before the monster can get up, the team gains a speed boost.

As Brandon still lays down fire, the monster seems to really feel the force of each bullet now. The three with melee weapons all rush, and while Nathan and Duncan are making huge strides toward the defeat of the monster...Jon is another story, he should have gotten a better spoon...or a different Specibus.

The monster recovers from his injured state and rises to his full height once again. The effort is in vain though. Duncan forces his fist into its shin, shattering the bone. It falls forward. You all continue to wail on the beast to no avail, this thing doesn't wish to embrace death.

You fight and fight, but it refuses to die. Finally after almost a full 30 minutes of battle, Duncan finally puts a well placed punch in the monster's foot. While it is injured Jon takes his spoon and becomes a whirlwind of fury. He brings the spoon down hard in the creature's head. It falls still. You've killed the beast!

"Good," Duncan says, no sweat, no signs of fatigue.

"I am the man!" Jon yells, "Did you see my amazing finishing attack with my spoon!"

"Damn!" Brandon adds to Jon's cry of victory, "That thing was definitely in a whole other league compared to the imps!"

"Speaking of imps," Nate interrupts, "perhaps now you guys can help me clear them from my house?"

"Sure, you guys go ahead and help him with the imp issue." Duncan says "I'll take care of the government buisness."

With that, you all board the shuttle and return to LOCAF.

END FOF CHAPTER 11

Say, dad. Do you remember my seventh birthday? I know it was long ago, but maybe you remember. I told you that all I wanted was a pony, just like most silly little girls would want...but you...you took it to heart. Hahaha. Mom was so mad when you pulled up a trailer containing an actual horse...and when she couldn't find anyone to take it, you hired some guys to build a stable in the back yard. God, the neighbors were so confused when horse manure started showing up in their yards. I guess, what I'm trying to say is...you were a good dad...so I know you wouldn't have killed them all without any good reason. So if that's the real you...if the one who bought a horse simply to make his little girl happy...was the real you...then why would you murder all those people? I guess I'll know soon enough, goodnight, dad. Cherry, signing off...


	12. Party Tricksters

You are now Jeremy Barett. You have been putting up with your server player's bullshit for a while, but breaking into your co-player's homes and eating all their snacks helps you cope with the bullshittery.

Your co-player's families seem kinda less surprised than you thought they would be. They also don't seem to notice how you have been stealing the small amount of food left in your homes.

The quest for food was sparked by your own need for snacks as you ran out, so you thought "Hey, let's just steal their shit!" You have just stopped in at Mark's house as your next stop on the great quest to liberate food from refrigerators. As you and your pack mule have stopped in and found a singular lollipop sitting atop his nightstand, wrapped in plastic wrap to preserve it. You greedily take the candy.

You decide to make a quick stop by the alchemiter and help out with Mark's little plan to duplicate that item that gives you money. You type in the code that Mark mentioned in the earlier Skype call, UrObUrOs. With this you can duplicate your own money.

You head over to the alchemiter to start making money. As you enter the code into the machine and out pops a lollipop of a different color than the one you have in your pocket. Does this make lollipops? As you reach for the delicious treat you can feel the one in the wrap vibrating and glowing with heat. The two candies quickly snap together and fuse into one swirling red and green lollipop.

You suddenly can't control the welling desire to take a taste of the sweet treat. You give the delicious lollipop a lick. The candy tastes bitter and sweet at the same time, the green tastes sweet, and the red supplies the bitter addition to the flavor. You feel an amazing surge of energy going through you, you can only think incredibly happy thoughts. Every reason you hate Alex suddenly fades from your mind, you simply see him as a great and helpful friend.

You our look at your friend and reach in and give him a large hug. As you retreat from the embrace you see that his hair has turned to a bright shade of red and his clothes have turned to bright and fun colors, he shall join you in your great joy.

"Dude, what the fuck?" Alex questions as you look upon his cheery new visage. As Alex begins yelling at you in very unkind words (which you can totally forgive, he's a cool guy), you hear the sound of footsteps and talking. Your friends are here! You can share this happiness with them!

"Oh! HELL! FUCKING! NO!" Brandon yells as he sees the scene playing out before him.

"Hey guys!" Alex greets, unaware of his happy new look.

"Oh crap!" Nathan adds to the gripping commentary.

"This didn't go well at all!" Mark gives his input.

"Oh no! It's all going quite well," You add, "I mean. Look how much fun we're having!"

"I fucking TOLD you!" Brandon screams at Mark.

"Hey, it's not my fault!" Mark retorts.

"What the actual fuck is happening right now?" Jon asks.

"They've gone trickster mode." Nate answers while the other two yell at each other. You need to make them give up all that hate, you should give them your power as well.

"That's it! I'm putting an end to this now!" Brandon raises his rifle and takes aim at you, but you are too fast for mere bullets. You dash forward and throw the rifle up with your left hand and give Brandon the mother of all high-fives with your right. As he begins to turn brighter and look happier, he collapses and has a massive seizure. He's probably fine.

You then proceed to high-five Nate, high-five Mark and high-five Jon. The fun friendly activity seems to have made them all a bit happier. You feel fulfilled as they all take on much happier expressions and more glowing personalities! You lead your now cheerful friends to the alchemiter and begin to start making some more fun weapons. You make the Spork of Zillywut and hand it to a giddy Jon ready to accept his present. You then make the Flintlocks of Zillyhau and throw out one, you only need one. Finally you make the Cutlass of Zillywair and give it to an uninthusiastic Alex.

With you done doing the best you can with the weapon production you all proceed to do a silly dance (insert silly dance here).

That was quite a fun dance and you greatly enjoyed it! You now all decide to play a fun game of Monopoly, by which we mean buying all of the weapon factories in the Medium and selling them all at new, lower prices. Millions of boonbucks down the drain, but well worth it to help these people.

You return to Mark's house to find Brandon's brother leaning over Brandon's colorful and sleeping body. "Which one of you did this to my little brother?" He asks in a stern voice. You raise your arm, you feel he could use the sleep. "Well, I don't quite think you got the memo," He liberally applies his fist to your face, "the only person allowed to knock out my brother and dye his hair a stupid color is me!"

You fall to the ground writhing in pain. You finally slip out of consciousness.

You are now Alex. Duncan just knocked Jeremy the fuck out, so you better watch what you say.

"So," Duncan adds to his previous, moving arguement of his rights to wreck his brother's shit, "what the fuck happened to you guys?"

"I don't quite know," you answer, "he just kinda, turned us this way."

Duncan takes a look at Nate, who has magically donned a bright yellow suit with a pink tie accented with purple polka dots. "What the fuck are you wearing?" He asks with a look of both surprise and dissapointment.

"I am wearing a quite dank suit." Nathan responds. Even when he is trickster mode, dank is the first thing on his mind(LOL on his Mind).

"Well, at the very least there appears to be only a slight change in attitude for him," Duncan observes, "But why are you the only one who has no change in personality whatsoever?"

Your response is simple: "I don't know."

"Well, what caused all this in the first place?"

You hold up the swirling lollipop.

"Then you should go ahead and hold on to that. Wouldn't want this happening again." Duncan adds, "I'll just take my light-weight brother home."

As he goes over and begins to lift Brandon, Duncan wakes up an angry looking Brandon. The unhappy Doom player looks over the team and promptly says: "Oh...hell no!" He raises his gun with a wobbly hand and pulls the trigger. Before he can put a bullet in your head Duncan lodges his fist into Brandon's stomach. The bullet strays and hits Jon in the throat. Brandon lets out a swear under his rasping breath.

He pushes his brother to the side and stands over the body. He raises his gun once again and loads a new clip into the rifle. The clip is marked with a red cross used to signify it has medical purposes. He puts the gun to the dead Jon's lips and pulls the trigger. A pair of plastic lips comes from the barrel, the purpose is unknown to you. "That should do it..." He lets out one gasp and then collapses again on the floor. Duncan lifts up the collapsed murderer and carries him off.

"Wait! wait! wait!" You protest, "He just killed Jon!"

"And he just revived him!" Duncan replies, "If you kiss a fallen teammate's corpse they will revive as their dream-self. Brandon just found a way around making out with dead bodies." And with that he left through the door to head back to his home with his brother. How he was strong enough to lift someone the same size as him, you will never understand, but at the very least Jon's not totally dead.

With the whole situation under control you head over to the Alchemiter and combine the Cutlass of Zillywair, your flaming sword, and the swirly lollipop to create: The Tricky Fire-blade of Zillywair or TFZ for short.

After you finish with your masterpiece you round up each of your teammates and send each of them to their respective homes and wait for the drugs to wear off. In the whole process of Jon being murdered and you all becoming something out of the mind of a psychotic clown, you didn't notice you reached the a new rung on your Eccheladder: Ethereal Spellcaster. With your new rank attained and a day full of shit going down, you decide that this would be a good point to call it a day, you head home, and go to sleep.

END OF CHAPTER 12

Well dad, I've decided! The odds of you receiving this are too high for me to allow Cherry to keep using the radio to try and contact you. So I'm going to destroy the transmitter. You're a cold, heartless man, who killed everyone around him, and I think that, as her brother, I should not allow you to contact Cherry back. Oh, and I'm sure she told you the sappy horse story, well that horse had a bum leg and was going to be put down anyway, don't go building up your ego, fucker! She can speak to you for the last five minutes of your life, before I end you! Goodbye, and fuck you! *static*


	13. Check

You are now Duncan Samuels. You have been awake for a while now, and you have even gotten yourself some breakfast. You expect your brother to be awake soon, it's about 8:30 so any minute he should return from his forcefully induced nap.

Speak of the devil. Brandon comes down the stairs rubbing his eyes and clutching his stomach. "Morning, trigger-happy!" You say as he enters the living room.

"Ha ha, asshole!" He says without looking up from his direct path to the kitchen, "What's for breakfast?"

"Lightning fruit and toast."

"Why didn't you get anything but lightning fruit from the village?"

"Because lightning fruit's got nutrients."

"There is such a thing as showing off when it comes to exercising."

"If there is then I don't care!"

"You are quite possibly the most annoying person I have ever met."

"Well you are the most annoying acne-monster I have ever met!"

"I don't take kindly to that!"

"Well do you take kindly to a battle to the death?" Or as normal people would put it: A game of chess.

"Why not? I've got time."

This was a foolish decision on his part, your brother has never beat you at chess. The only time he ever got close, you tricked him into a draw by repetition. "Black or white?" You ask, letting him decide his color pieces.

"Black, I'll take the tactical advantage."

You move first, Pawn to E4

He responds with Pawn to G6

Your move, pawn to D4

"So..." You ask as he thinks about his move, "how exactly do we get out of the Medium?"

His move, Bishop to H6

"We create a universe."

Your move, Bishop to C4

"How exactly do we do that?"

His move, Bishop to C1, bishop takes bishop

Your move, Queen to C1, Queen takes bishop

"We need to do several things..."

His move, Pawn to H5

Your move, Knight to F3

"We need to kill seven gods, an evil King, and breed frogs."

His move, Pawn to G5

"Breed frogs?"

Your move, Knight to G5, knight takes pawn

His move, Knight to H6

"We need to create the 'optimal frog',"

Your move, Queen to D1

"What does this 'optimal frog' do?"

His move, Knight to G4

"You can refer to him as Billious Slick, and he IS the universe we are going to make."

Your move, Bishop to F7, bishop takes pawn, check

"Well done, but I don't intend to lose this early on."

His move King to F8

Your move, Queen to F3

"You've never beaten me before and you won't now!"

His move, King to G7

Your move, Queen to F5

"I forfeit!" He proclaims.

"Why? You've never done it before."

"Mate I three moves, I guess I'll just never beat you."

How did he do that? He's never seen mate moves ahead before. Was he able to predict the outcome. He couldn't have just suddenly gotten better and still let this get this far. "How did you know that?"

"I was able to see every failure before I made the move."

"How?"

"It comes with the Doom aspect, I can predict the bad outcomes of the future."

"Then how did you still lose?"

"I can only see loss, not success, I knew every move that would end badly for me, not every one that would go well for you."

"But, you could have lasted so much longer if you could see every peice you lost! Why didn't you use this to win?"

"Duncan, sometimes losing is inevitable. I'm not destined to beat you, and Jon was destined to die yesterday. I can see the future, but I can't escape fate. If I could, we wouldn't have lost Earth"

"But why did you decide to forfeit this time, when you've clearly lost and never given up before?"

"Sometimes the best way to win, is to give up while the casualties are low. When the the King knows he's going to lose, it's his decision to go down in battle, or to spare his men the same fate as him."

"Wait! If you knew when you were going to lose, did you know the outcome of the game from the beginning?"

"Duncan, I don't need to be psychic to know that I'm going to lose a chess game against someone with an ELA rating 700 higher than mine."

And with that he was gone, up the stairs. What was that all about? The way he talked he acted like he knew what a real battle was like. A real war, against other, intelligent life forms. How could he know about something like that, video games only go so far. What did he see when he looked into the future? Whatever it was, you know it had to be something a lot worse than a few chess pieces being taken.

END OF CHAPTER 13


	14. The Page of Space

You are now Mark, it would seem that a recent chapter was from your perspective but we're back here, almost as if a certain person (WHO TOTALLY KNOWS WHO THEY ARE) is making us look from your perspective.

You awaken with a searing pain in your head. You've got one hell of a hangover from the space drugs. You head to the bathroom to start your morning routine. As you brush your teeth through the war going on in your skull, you look in the mirror. Your blonde hair is a mess with slight tinge of pink still in some of the hairs. You don't have glasses like most of your teammates, just one less thing to keep up with.

You finish up your morning routine, and decide to check in with your team to see what exactly happened during the drug-induced gaps in your memory. You notice that Jon is online, you think he would probably know best considering all that went down yesterday.

Skype Call:

JC - What do you want, Mark?

MC - Hey, so what exactly happened yesterday? My memory's kinda hazy.

JC - Well, let me think. Jeremy fucked up, made us go trickster mode, and gave me a sick spork. Oh yeah, and if I remember correctly there was a part where Brandon fucking murdered me!

MC - Oh...yeah. Hey, I have a question.

JC - What?

MC - What's it like...you know...when you stop breathing.

JC - What, like when you hold your breath? Have you never held your breath before?

MC - No, when your heart stops beating too.

JC - You mean dying? Because the right term is dying. And it's not fun.

MC - I assumed it wasn't enjoyable, but what does it feel like?

JC - Like being shot in the head, and then just waking up as your dream self, does that answer your question?

MC - Well, you didn't have to be so rude about it!

JC - Oh, on the contrary, I did, because you're overhere acting like referring to my death as a type of issue similar to that of not trying to use racist terms around people of that race.

MC - Well, I didn't want to offend you.

JC - How was that going to offend me?

MC - I thought your wouldn't want to talk about your death. I haven't exactly died before.

JC - Well, after you've died, you realize it's not that big a deal.

MC - Well, was there some kind of afterlife, did you meet a god?

JC - Mark, you know what the fuck dream bubbles are, that still applies here.

MC - Oh, yeah.

JC - What did you think would happen? Did you think we would die and just be greeted by the son of the great bush god?

MC - No. I just wondered if maybe you would see anything other than waking up on Derse.

JC - Yeah, I saw nothing, because that's how this works, which you should know if you're farther than me in Homestuck!

MC - Can we just change the subject?

JC - If that isn't the subject you want to talk about then why did you call me and open with that?

MC - Shut up.

Skype Call End

You're tired of being questioned and oppressed by Jon. People just don't understand you, they probably just don't like that you're a brony. They just hate because they don't know good programming. I mean, seriously, a teenage boy who watches a show about talking pink ponies who have magic powers is living the true American way.

You head up the stairs to your first gate, you know that your consorts won't try to oppress you. You step out onto a cold street, houses crowd on both sides. You recognize this as the slums of your planet: The Land of Conflict and Claustraphobia. These streets are run by gangs who fight for control of sections of the city. Some fight for just causes such as wanting to supply food to the people from their plots of land. While others will fight for free rights to other people's stuff. For penguins they're quite violent.

You wind your way through the narrow streets to the abandoned steel mill that serves as one specific gang who you have decided to provide your support, the Southies. They took the name because of their location on the southern edge of the city. They seem like generally good penguin folks. They fight for good reasons, but some of the members think that this means they can do whatever they want and proclaim it in the name of justice.

You walk into the compound and are immediately greeted by their leader, Cain. "Hey, Mark, we need your help on something." He always chooses to call you Mark and not "the Page" he said it's because he's not the religious type.

"What's up?" You inquire

"We've got a big problem," Cain says, "the guard took Saph, she's in the prison on the east side of town." Sapphire was Cain's second in command, not the first time she got caught, but she was reliable and cunning. A good thing to the group.

"How are we supposed to get her out? Do you have a plan?"

"Yeah, we've got a plan. It's time for a jail break!"

END OF CHAPTER 14


	15. Letters From the Past

You look down at the typed letter, all you he left you. It reads -

Dear Cherry,

I'm sorry, but I had to do it. I had to kill them all. I didn't want to but I did it with good reasons that I just can't explain in this letter. Along with this letter I include a picture. This picture is of a young man named Brandon, he's about the same age as you and I want you to find him. He should be expecting you by the time you get there. I am also including a letter that is ment for Brandon. Once you find him, give him the letter, and introduce yourself. Fair warning Sam and Brandon probably won't get along, but I want you to keep them from murdering each other. I will be heading there too, but I expect to arrive much later than you, so hold on to the letter. The trip should be a long one, so try to keep everyone from going crazy. But then again I'm sure Elise can do that for you. You should find Brandon at these coordinates (coordinates withheld)

\- Sincerely, Dad

You are now Cherry, you look up from the letter and examine the room you and two other girls share on this ship. The room is small and Elise has trouble trying not to bang her head on the ceiling. You don't have trouble with this though, you're not a tall person.

You now look back down at the picture he included with the letter. The person your dad knows as Brandon is looking into the camera holding a rifle behind his head. He's draped in an Heir of Doom god-tier. He has the expression of someone who isn't used to smiling, and a vibe of generally not giving a fuck about photography. From the whole god-tier outfit you know he's either from a session like your own, or he had the outfit made for him. Most likely the former.

You decide to stop moping in your room and head out into the corridor to find something to do. This was an immediate mistake because as soon as you exit the room you can hear the sounds of battle. What are those two fighting about now? You rush down the hall toward the noise and find your brother and Elise locked in combat as usual.

"Stop it!" You yell at the two attacking each other. You manage to pull them off each other. "What's happening?" You ask in a stern voice.

"This bastard destroyed the radio transmitter!" Elise yells.

"You did WHAT?" You scream at your brother, your levels of anger increasing to great heights.

"I destroyed the transmitter." Sam replies plainly

"But why, you asshole?" You can't take anymore of this shit.

"Because you keep trying to contact dad. I can't let that happen." Sam says.

"Why don't you want me to contact dad? Maybe I WANT to find my father!" He's now become the world's biggest asshole.

"Cherry, think about this. If he was perfectly fine with murdering all his friends and an entire solar system, maybe he isn't someone you should associate with." He's trying to argue around things again.

"Sam, this isn't a decision you should make for her!" Elise at least takes your side.

"He's not your dad, now is he Elise?" Sam has just become SUCH an asshole.

"Did you not read the letter Sam?" You ask once again.

"Yes," he responds, "I read the letter, but there is no good reason to blow up that many people!"

"What are you three yelling about now?" Angelica's here now too, great, just great.

"He broke the radio transmitter!" Elise answers.

"What use is a radio when we're traveling through space at a million miles an hour and have no people to actually contact with it?" Angelica has never taken your side on the whole "looking for you dad" thing.

"What are you guys screaming about in here?" Yes, Will's here, he'll take your side on this!

"Sorry to interrupt this thrilling dicussion, but we are about to pass through a fairly large dream bubble!" The ship's AI. You like to call him Jeaves.

"Alright, Jeaves!" You say "We'll talk about this later, for now let's go see some dead people!"


	16. Spoons and (Impotant) Matters

You are now Jonathan. You have decided to take the sweet spork you had to pay your life to get and make an awesome weapon. You look around for things to add in to the Alchmiter to make a good weapon. You eventually find yourself in the attic looking through old junk when you find it, the perfect thing. A speak-n-spell! But now you don't know what else to add in. Something to make it cooler in some way. Maybe if you could make it have a British accent!

You head down to the kitchen and have an idea, you fill a glass halfway with water and take your glasses to the Punch Designix. You mess around for a few minutes and make a monocle. Now everything is ready! You combine the three items in the Designix and take the totem you make with the card to the Alchemiter. You have made it, your master peice. One British, talking spork with an attitude, Sir Reginald of Zillywut!

"Hello master!" The spork happily cheers, "I am Sir Reginald of Zillywut, great knight, hero, and half fork!"

"You mean a spork?" You ask.

"The appropriate term is half-fork, I find the term spork offensive." Apparently spor- half-forks have their own derogatory terms.

"We are going to go kill shit together Reginald!"

"Good! Who is the enemy? What are theirs numbers? When do I get to kill things?" He is eager for blood!

"Our enemy, the black king and his army. Their numbers, unknown, but a lot. When do we start, now!" This is going to be fun! Oh, wait Skype call from...the guy who murdered you.

Skype Call:

BS - Hey, Jon what's up?

JC - Nothing, just giving a pep-talk to my "half-fork".

BS - Did I damage your head when I shot you?

JC - I am perfectly sane! Reginald is my new weapon! Don't judge him!

BS - And you named your weapon too, are you sure you're okay?

JC - I am perfectly fine! Stop doubting Reginald, can't you see you're hurting his feelings!

BS - No, I'm sorry I can't tell I'm hurting a spoon's feelings

JC - Is it so unreasonable to believe that someone could be having an intelligent conversation with utinsels!

BS - Yes.

JC - Here, just talk to him...

BS - There is not talking—

JC - Hello, there kind fello! I heard you would like to speak with me.

BS - Oh god dammit! He actually made a fucking talking spoon.

JC - I am no mere spoon! I am Sir Reginald of Zillywut! I am a great warrior known throughout the land, and I will have you know, I am half fork on my mother's side.

BS - I don't think spoons or forks have mothers.

JC - I will admit, I don't quite have actual parents, but I like to think it's on my mother's side.

BS - Okay, well talking spoons exempted from the dicussion, I need to speak with Jon.

JC - Very well sir. Master, he wishes to speak to you...see, I told you, talking spoon!

BS - With that dealt with, two things to tell you. One - sorry for murdering you, my bad. Two - Mark says he needs help with something on his planet, and the job sound like one that requires thieving expertise.

JC - What kind of job?

BS - Jailbreak from a maximum security prison with little to no background knowledge of the area.

JC - Ooo, the fun kind of jail break! I'm in!

BS - Good, because we need everyone for this job!

JC - So when does this mission take place?

BS - Cain says he needs a little bit more time to finish the plan, we should be ready for action in about two days. Until then, climb your Eccheladder, we all need to be at our strongest when we do this.

JC - Got it. Reginald and I will be ready!

BS - Well, good luck with that, I need to get to my quest bed.

JC - Wait what? How are you ready to God-tier already?

BS - I beat Duncan in a fight.

JC - You beat the guy who broke the leg of a Minotaur in one punch...in a fight?

BS - Yes.

JC - How?

BS - Bullets are still a thing. It turns out that when you start far away from each other, and you have a gun, it's pretty easy to beat a guy who punches people.

JC - Wow, fucking wow.

BS - Yeah, fucking bullets do things. Amazing, right?

JC - So you just shot your own brother?

BS - Relax! Two shots, one to the leg, one to the shoulder. He's healing at one of my planet's very advanced hospitals. Anyway, death. Gotta do it. Goodbye.

Skype Call End

Jail break eh? You like the sound of this. Why he needs everyone, you don't know. You feel Alex would probably rather burn the place to the ground then break into it. If you know your team, this jailbreak is going down the toilet fast.

"If you are done sir I think that our enemies deserve a right beating!" Reginald says.

"Yes, Reginald, we need to get moving."

"Are we going to slay things, oh I do quite love slaying things!"

"Yes we will get to slay things."

"Yes! I will prove the might of the great Half-Forks, or my name is not, Sir Reginald!"

END OF CHAPTER 16, BITCH!


	17. Answers From the Dark

"Jeaves, alert our engineer to our situation" Cherry says, she's grown too used to the advantages of the computer.

"Already done, miss!" Jeaves replies in his usual monotone voice.

"It's been a while since we've entered a dream bubble, this should be fun!" Elise tries to lighten things up.

"I still stand by my decision to destroy the transmitter!" You say. This discussion is not through.

"This conversation is OVER, Sam." Cherry says.

"Yeah, maybe you should just get over it!" Will adds. He just gets under your skin, there has to be something up with this guy. The way he carries himself, the way he talks, even the way he and your sister act around each other, it all reeks of deceit.

"Fine, I'll be going then. I wouldn't want to bother you and the ghosts you hang out with, Sakura." Your sister's given name. She hates it when people call her that, mostly because dad called her that.

This while journey was a terrible idea from the start. Cherry was the only one who wanted to leave the session. You already won, and right before you entered the new world you made, she got a message. It was short and to the point a text from light years away reading: "Sakura, I'm sorry" - Dad. With that text you flew across the dark expanse of the void. She was the only one who wanted to find him, the rest of the team thought he was dead, well except for Wil, because he seems to go along with anything Cherry says.

All you found at the end of that path was a galaxy. A massive, bright galaxy, all revolving around a massive, green star, and in orbit around one of the smaller stars in this galaxy, in a massive field of asteroids you found a house. In this house was a note, everything else was either burned or shredded, nothing left for you to recognize. The note was simple, he killed everyone in the area of what is now the green star where several inhabited planets once resided, he was sorry, and he included coordinates to a new stop and now Cherry clings to that letter with her life.

"Stop calling me that!" She chimes in, "you know how I hate being called that!"

"How did he even get a japanese name for his daughter? He lived in America!" You ask, for the first time. Perhaps you should have asked this question a long time ago.

"We have more pressing matters currently Sam!"

"Maybe you two could learn to stop fighting!" Will adds, fuck you Will!

"Whatever, everyone to sleep if you want to do anything in the dream bubble." She dodges his suggestion.

"Oh, so when your boyfriend asks you to be decent to your brother you won't even acknowledge his request?" Elise teases. She enjoyed ruining their relationship as much as you did. The two of you both agree it's fun to mess with your paradox sibling and their love life.

"Hey, she's entitled to her opinion, Elise." Will responds.

"I can handle my own arguements." Cherry says, it's clear who wears the pants in their relationship.

"Fine, when did you become little miss ice queen?" Wil retorts.

"What was that?" Cherry starts getting angry.

"Nothing!" Will knows quite well that hell hath no fury like a woman scorn.

"That's what I thought!" Cherry follows.

Suddenly a bored voice comes ove the intercom. "Hey guys, it's me, Tim, we have an update on our arrival!"

"What, Tim?" You ask.

"Well, I was able to, after several hours of work, over-clock the main engine. We should be arriving about 2 months ahead of schedule!" Tim replies half enthused.

"Way to go, Tim!" Elise cheers.

"Yeah, great job, Tim. Things are starting to look up." Cherry says. "You've earned a break. Just in time too, we're entering a dream bubble!"

Tim replies with a resounding: "Yay, I get to sleep for the first time in what? Three days?"

"Well go ahead and sleep up, we've got a long journey ahead." Cherry says.

"Well, actually..." Tim paused.

"Actually what?" You ask.

"Well, I assume you know of Einstein's theory of relativity," Tim began, "well, according to his theory, if you go close to the speed of light, time seems to slow down. We may perceive time as passing normally, but the world outside of this ship is moving in slow motion by comparison."

"So how long will it feel like to us?" You ask.

"I'd say about three weeks to a month"

"Well then this trip may not be so bad after all." Will said trying to lighten the mood. Another month on this ship would still be hell.

Just then, Jeaves comes over the speaker.

"Mistress Cherry, we have an incoming radio transmission."

"I thought Sam destroyed the transmitter." She said, somewhat confused.

"He did, but he didn't harm the receiver."

"Alright, play the message!" She clearly just wants to spite you and your disdain of the radio idea.

"Very well madam."

Jeaves goes silent as static played over the speakers, after about twenty second a voice come on.

"You know Sam, I don't think it's very kind to destroy something your sister cares about. Maybe you should learn to respect other people's feelings."

With that short taunt Cherry's voice had been reduced to high pitched squeaks. She stared blankly at the speaker in disbelief.

"What's wrong?" You ask.

"That was dad."

END OF CHAPTER 17


	18. Dinner With Death

You are now Brandon Samuels. You sit on you quest bed with four bottles of whiskey, looking at the pros and cons of alcohol poisoning. You are interrupted by a call from Alex.

Skype Call:

BS - What's up Alex?

AR - I need you to help me make a weapon!

BS - Why do you need a new weapon? What happened to the flaming trickster sword?

AR - It's a good weapon, but I want to make a specific weapon.

BS - What weapon?

AR - Because you seem to be good at combining random things to get decent results, I want you to help me make the Monado.

BS - NO!

AR - But why?

BS - I believe that I am not the only one on the team who thinks you shouldn't wield the blade of a god.

AR - But I could use the Monado Arts and see the future!

BS - Would you like to provide any more reasons why we shouldn't give the arsonist the god-sword.

AR - Come on, please!

BS - Hell no, now if you'll excuse me, I need to commit suicide!

AR - Wait, what!?

BS - I need to kill myself in exchange for immortality. It's all part of the game.

AR - Wait, will I have to do this too?

BS - Eventually, or if you'd like I could murder you instead.

AR - That's a tough call, kill myself or have my friend murder me.

BS - You just pick what you think is the lesser of two evils.

AR - I'll have to think on it.

BS - Anyway, back to suicide.

Skype Call End.

You look at the four bottles of whiskey you alchemised from a bottle of whiskey your brother left out. You figure one or two should be enough to kill you, but it's better to be on the safe side. You begin to drink, you don't focus on the taste, you think of what will come. One bottle down. Your vision blurs and your head is filled with a sharp pain. You open another bottle and drink. About half-way down your vision darkens and you fall back.

The darkness stays for a moment, and then it is filled with a scene you have never encountered. A vision? You sit at a table, across from a woman wearing a Sylph of Life outfit. You look to the side to see a small figure in a cloak that covers their face. A child? Behind the child stands a tall man in cloak as well, it is to dark to see their faces under the hoods. Wrapped around the child's shoulders is a snake, scales of crimson and eyes that watch his every move. The child begins to speak.

"Please, sir," He sounds on the verge of tears, "I don't wish for this. I want it to go away!"

Your voice emerges without your command, "Well, young man, I can't change your fate without breaking the Code of the Gods. However, I may have one way for you to seize your fate."

"Please! I'll do anything!"

"You must make a deal with the devil!"

"What's a devil?"

"Something from where we once came from, he served a similar role to what I do now. He struck fear into the hearts of Earth's children and was a vision of what one should not do."

"Then I'll make this deal! What are your terms, devil?"

"I will remove your Shadow's fangs. He will still be there, but he will be unable to kill you. In exchange, you must climb to the highest ranks of the noble classes; you must become the king of this decrepit land, and then...you will unite them, you will unite these people under one flag. I give this world to you in exchange. These are my terms."

"I accept."

"Then I name you the rightful heir to the throne of Dralk!"

With those words, it fades again to black.

You now sit at a table across from someone else. He is a young man, probably somewhere in his mid-twenties. He looks up from his glass and takes a moment to analyze your face.

"Hello" The man says.

You wait a moment for what you are supposed to say, but nothing happens.

"My dear boy, this is not a vision. This is all happening in real time."

"Alright," you say, words finally escaping your mouth, "Hello, I'm Brandon."

"Nice to meet you, I go by Grimm."

"What kind of name is Grimm?"

"It's an alias numbskull."

"Why the alias?"

"I have people looking for me, and I don't feel like being found."

"What kind of people?"

"I have a son, and a daughter."

"Not the best dad are you?"

"I haven't been the greatest dad, but I've tried."

"Why pick Grimm as a fake name?"

"I like the name for when one murderer speaks to another."

"Murderer?"

"Well, the more appropriate term would be mass murderer, not just murderer. For you as well."

"I'm supposed to be a mass murderer?"

"Well, not yet, but that's why I came to warn you. I don't want others to follow in my footsteps. I don't want you to be comparable to Hitler, like me."

"What did you do?"

"Are you aware of a bomb called a Tumor?"

"Yes"

"I took one of these bombs, and placed it in orbit around a star that was orbited by several inhabited planets. Then I set the bomb off."

"So you destroyed an entire planet?"

"Several planets."

"Why? For what reason could you have to destroy several planets?"

"They were planets of corruption and sin, not worthy of surviving!"

"So you thought the obvious course was to destroy them?!"

"I had watched for years as these planets ate away at themselves. I had tried many times to make them see the light, but they chose evil. So I destroyed them."

"You're a psychopath!"

"Call me what you wish, but don't leave yet. I have something else to tell you."

"What?"

"I mentioned my son and daughter. I have told them to come to your game session."

"If your family is anything like you then that's not a good thing!"

"Relax, my daughter is to forgiving to be like me, and my son wants me dead for my crimes."

"He's right on that one."

"He's a little to late."

He looks into your eyes and you see something that you feel stupid for not noticing, his eyes were completely white.

"One more thing," he continues, "You should make your friend the sword he wants."

You sit up quickly, you're awake. You look down to see dark green pajamas on your body with a black skull in the center of the shirt. You pick up your jacket and put it on.

Skype Call:

AR - Hey, what happened to killing yourself?

BS - I already did that.

AR - Oh, then what do you want?

BS - I've changed my mind. I'll help you make a Monado

END OF CHAPTER 18


	19. What the Hell Just Happened?

You are now Alex, and you stand around your new weapon looking down on it. It took a few hours to gather the materials needed and another few to come up with the list in the first place. The blade looked similar to the original Monado, but with a navy blue paint job.

"There's one problem with it," Brandon says, "you can't use it."

"What! Why?" You ask.

"The Monado is no simple sword. It needs emmense power to work. It needs to be wielded by a god." He lifts up the weapon, "For example if I concentrate..." The glass in the center of the blade glows dimly and the metal separates, but no blade emerges. "Because I'm now a god, I can power it. However, I have nowhere near enough power to get it to work effectively."

"So what do we do?"

"Well, there's always the option of having you god tier, but that wouldn't solve the issue. It would just give us another person who can barely turn on the damn thing."

"Any ideas?"

"If we could somehow get your denizen to either give the sword power, or trap their soul within it, that would work. The denizens are much more powerful gods than we are getting to be any time soon."

"How are we supposed to do that?"

"I don't know about having them help you. The denizens are usually shady, deal-making assholes. But if you want to trap the sound of the denizen in the weapon then Duncan is our go-to guy. He's God powers would give him dominion over their souls, if we can kill them that is."

"Why do we need to kill them first?"

"Did you seriously just ask why it would be difficult to sever a soul from its living body? It's because dead bodies don't cling to their souls like an addict to denial!"

"Why do we even need the power of a god to make the Monado turn on anyway? Shulk used it just fine."

"While he may have used it fine for reasons pertaining to the story of the game, you are not walking the body of a sleeping god, are you?"

"Good point. So, when can we get this thing to work?"

"We'll have to wait until the prison break is done. I need more time to think on the subject, look for alternative means of power than either gods or strapping a car battery to the side of the sword. Anyway, we need to get to the meeting about the mission tomorrow."

After the talk you both start to head for the meeting to discuss the plan for the prison break. Before you head out you grab the sword which Brandon had dubbed the Monado Aperture. You arrive to find the others waiting for you and a few raise an eyebrow when they see the weapon on your back, but nobody asks any questions.

You all stand around a table as the penguin who you assume is Cain lays out a map of the prison.

"Alright," Cain begins, "According to our intel, Saph is here." He points out a spot on the map labeled "Cell Block C". Cain then continues, "There are several cameras in the halls, so we need to first get to the generator in the basement."

"There's one problem!" He yells, "You're a liar, Cain."

"What are you talking about?" Cain says defensively.

"It's true, he's lying! He knows full well that the girl we're looking for is in the medical ward, on life support."

"But why would he want to kill his second-in-command?" Mark says looking puzzled.

"She has information, if we continue on this path, she will die. He wants her dead so that she can't give up information on how to topple his little band of misfits!"

"You have no proof of this!" Cain yells angrily.

"I can see it now, I see you gloating victory as Jon and Alex just 'stumble across' her dead body. This isn't a rescue mission, it's just him tying up loose ends!"

"He's a traitor!" Yells one of the onlooking penguins.

Brandon takes a look at Mark, who dons a look of betrayal. "Mark, it's your choice how we deal with him. He is one of your consorts."

Mark looks over the penguins and takes a breath. "Throw him in the holding cells!"

With this call Cain is mobbed by penguins and is quickly hauled off to somewhere unknown which probably has holding cells.

"What the fuck just happened?" Jeremy looks at the team one by one.

"Umm...I think Brandon just saw the future?" Jon says with a confused tone as he shrugs.

"Yes, I did. Also that gives me one hell of a headache." Brandon says clutching his skull.

"Well that's all well and good, but what now?" Nate asks "Are we just gonn leave the penguin girl in jail?"

"No," Mark says, "We'll just use his plan without destroying the generator."

"How do we use a plan that we didn't fully hear?" Jon asks.

"I believe I can help there!" One of the penguins says, "I know the plans like the back of my hand. I was supposed to be the one who gives orders over the radio."

"Perfect!" Brandon says. "Perfect" most likely meaning "good, because I didn't have a back-up plan"

"For now the plan isn't important, I can revise it and we should be ready for tomorrow." The penguin says.

Now it's time to rest up for the REAL jail-break.

END OF CHAPTER 19


	20. Nice to Meet You

You're now Tim, while you're not busy being a fucking mechanical genius for your team, you enjoy staying in your room and not doing shit. The only reason you work on the ship is because you are the only one who knows anything about machines other than how to put tab B into slot A.

With your mission to get the ship closer to the speed of light rewarded by success and a free chance to sleep, you decide to rest.

You "awake" inside the dream bubble. Cherry refuses to open the ship when your're inside one of these things in order to avoid being stuck in it while the ship moves on. You begin to walk and take in the memory of your old house. You're interrupted by the sound of voices. You enjoy talking to the ghosts so you go to take a look.

As you look you see a young man around the age of fifteen, maybe sixteen. He sits across from an older man, around his thirties. You listen in on their conversation.

"I'm waiting for someone else to arrive." The young one says

"Oh?" The old man says, "One of your friends, I assume."

"Yeah," The young one continues "Keep an eye out for a short guy with glasses."

As if on cue, a short boy with glasses appears.

"Hey." The tall boy says.

"Hello, nerd." The short boy says.

"Hello, I am Grimm." Says the man.

"I'm Jon." Says the short one.

"It's nice to meet you, but three is a crowd, so I'll be leaving." The man says.

Without the chance for a word from either, the man known as Grimm disappears.

"Well that meeting was very short." Says the tall one.

"Yeah, why did you bring me to meet a guy who's gonna leave immediately?" Says the Jon one.

"I didn't know he would pull some shit like that." Says the tall one.

At this moment you decide to be introduce yourself to the ghosts.

"Hello," You say, "I'm Tim."

"Hello, you're not dead." Says the tall one.

At this moment you notice that the two have pupils and irises. They're very much alive.

"Who are you?" Says the Jon one.

"I just said, I'm Tim." You answer, "Are you two from the session we're approaching?"

"What?" The Jon one asks.

At this moment the tall one pulls an unexpected move and a rifle appears in his hand. He then shoots his friend in the face.

"Sorry, but I'm not too sure about letting my team know about the whole other team coming to our session yet. They have too much on their minds at the moment anyway."

"Well who are you?"

"I'm Brandon. Now, how about a change of scenery?"

With this a bubble appears and he jumps in. Into the rabbit hole, Alice.

You arrive at a house, you look around the foyer and see a living room in front of you, a walkway above, and a dining room to the right. Brandon sits in a chair at the dining table. You take the seat across from him.

"Why are you coming to our session?" Brandon asks.

"Our leader is looking for her father." You answer.

"So I'm assuming that this girl—Cherry—is your leader?"

"How did you know her name?" You ask, worried about what else he knows.

"Let's just say I've met her father."

"So he is here?"

"Both yes, and no." He says, as if it answers your question.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Can you keep a secret from her?"

"Yeah, I'm probably the only one on the ship who can."

"Alright...he's dead."

"WHAT?!" You say in shock from this revelation. To think your whole journey was a waste.

"He's quite dead."

"She's not gonna be happy to learn this!"

"Which is exactly why she can't."

"So what should I do? Just go around acting like I don't know her father is dead?"

"Yeah. What's so difficult about it?"

"It's her father, dude!"

"Is he your father?"

"No."

"Then why should you fucking care?" Something is seriously wrong in this guy's head.

"Wow. You're a messed up guy."

"Damn right!"

"Anyway, do you know why you're really coming to this session?"

"No, do you?"

"Bitch, I'm asking. I have a feeling that something bad was going to happen, but my powers aren't strong enough to see it clearly."

"So you can tell when something bad is going to happen?"

"Yeah, comes with the doom aspect."

"Cool, I still prefer my aspect."

"Yeah, light has some cool powers too."

"I just kinda wish I got some other class than bard, it makes it hard to use my aspect."

"It just takes patience. Speaking of titles, what are your friend's titles?"

"Well, there's Cherry whose the Sylph of Life; Her brother is the Knight of Rage; My sister is the Maid of Blood; Our friend Will is the Thief of Heart, and finally his sister who's the Witch of Hope."

"Souldn't you have a space player and a time player?"

"Should we? I had no idea we were supposed to."

"Well I don't remember any point where it's explicitly stated that you need them, but you should at least have a space player."

"Do you have a space player and a time player?"

"Yeah, we have a Page of Space and I think I remember one of my co-players saying our friend is the Seer of Time."

"Those sound like the shittiest space and time players."

"Hey, don't doubt them. A page may seem weak, but I get the feeling he will become one of our most valuable assets. As for our seer, that means he has the gift of foresight."

"Can't you already see the future though?"

"I can only see unfortunate outcomes. He can see ALL outcomes."

"Who else do you have in your session?"

"Well, I'm the Heir of Doom, the short guy I shot earlier is the Rogue of Breath; Our local arsonistic Mage of Void and the memer Prince of Mind. Oh yeah, and my brother, the Knight of Heart!"

"Your team sounds a lot cooler."

"I don't know, I think I'd take your friend Cherry over our mage."

"Why?"

"When's the last time she tried to burn down something?"

"That seems like a good point."

"Anyway, it was nice meeting you, but I need to get going."

He rises from his seat then sticks out his hand. You shake his hand and he disappears.

"Hey, who was that?" You look up to see Cherry looking at you from the foyer you appeared in.

"Just a ghost," You say back "Just a ghost."

END OF CHAPTER 20


	21. What Happened to Snoop?

You are now a Prospitian in the desert. You spend your time either helping with the construction of the crazy Dersite's machines or looking for precious, precious water. The camp is a bit strange due to the fact that it's made of a collaboration of Dersites and Prospitians, and that weird guy who likes to be called Snoop. Because none of you had true names before you got to this endless desert, you have all taken names by your old roles. Everyone in the camp has taken to referring to each other by initials of your taken names. Everyone in the camp has a strange metal home that they either found or arrived in. I know, lots of info. Let's keep moving.

You walk up to the metal building given to your comrade in arms, another Prospitian soldier. His metal structure is made of two rooms, one that he uses as his bedroom, and the other which he uses as a main room. You enter into the main room and see the monitor on the wall. The monitor shows a short boy with glasses, must be whatever the weird Dersite calls a "patron kid". Whatever the fuck that means. You knock on the owner's bedroom door. As soon as you knock you begin to hear crashing from within the room. After a fair amount of crashing and banging the door is opened.

"What is it?" He asks as he looks you up and down as if surveying a possible threat.

"IV wants scrap metal." You respond, "Anything that is metallic and not currently being used."

"What is he planning now?"

"I don't know and I don't wanna know. All I know is if I get him parts he won't use it to kill me."

"Alright. I have some scrap lying around. Listen here, girl. That man's experiments are no good, if you keep helping him, you're gonna end up dead or seriously injured."

"I can handle myself and you know it."

"Whether of not you can defend yourself has nothing to do with th fact that something might explode. A hero shouldn't die by something as simple as a lab accident."

"I'm not a hero anymore. I can die how I so choose."

With that you walk away, hands full of useless metal. You come up on the home of Snoop. He is the only one in your group who is from neither Prospit nor Derse. He is also the only one who has a name of any kind.

"Hey Snoop."

"What's up homie?"

"I need any random scrap you have for IV's experiments."

"I don't think I have any random scrap. Does he need any burritos?"

"I don't think he's going to need burritos any time soon."

"Well, do you want one anyway? I have like 100 of these things."

"Sure. Why not?"

He hands you a burrito and you walk off. You never understood why these things are everywhere. You begin to head back to IV's home. You enter to the sight of walls covered in strange symbols and pictures you don't underatand. As usual you find him tinkering away at his workbench.

"Ah good," he say "You're back. Quickly hand me the metal!"

You hand him the metal and he turns to what he's working on.

"What are you building now?" You ask.

"This is something that will make gathering water much easier."

"How's that?"

"Well, this here is a condenser as I call it."

"What does it do?"

"This device here takes the water vapor in the air and then turns it into liquid water that we can drink."

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

"It will work, just watch!"

He takes the machine outside and turns it on. It makes sounds but nothing happens.

"I told you it wouldn't work."

"It takes time. Good things come to those who wait."

"So this is what we wasted that scrap metal on, lovely."

"If you doubt my genius, then why did you help me?"

"Because the other things you have made have been useful."

"This one is too!"

"Yes, if you define making unnecessary noise useful."

With that insult he stomps off to his metal home to pout. As he walks off some other members of the camp approach.

"What has he built now?" BN asks.

"It's supposed to collect water." You reply

"From where? We're in the desert." SG observes.

"More insane ramblings." You say, "Where are you two going?"

"SG's teaching me how to hunt." BN replies.

"You? Hunt?" You ask with a stunned look on your face. "Little miss 'how can you live without servants'?"

"Yeah." SG says, "I figured she's got to learn some way to be productive. Besides, hunting's simple!"

"Yeah for you and IS maybe, but she isn't going to know the first thing about how to use a bow."

"I know plenty!" BN interrupts angrily, "I was taught archery by some of the best warriors Prospit had to offer!"

"How much did you pay them?" You ask.

"Ha ha. You assume that they weren't begging to get the right to teach me!"

"So you payed a shitload?"

"Well...yes."

"I knew it!"

"So," you continue, "What are you out hunting today?"

"Desert hare." SG answers.

"Well good luck with that!" You say mockingly.

The two walk off and you head back to your home. You look on the monitor to see the young boy known as Mark talking to three of his friends. He is speaking to the one with the handgun, the large one with glasses, and the one dressed in dark green.

You begin to type, "Mark, hey, Mark!"

He looks around and says "What?" His friends look at him a bit puzzled. You always enjoy causing trouble.

"It's my exile." He says looking at his friends who turn back to what they were doing.

"Mark! What are you doing?" You type.

"We're working on something."

"What are you working on, moron?"

"We're making my weapon better."

"I want details! Please fully explain things!"

"We're working on trying to make my weapon able to control other's movements."

"We're ready." Says the one with the handgun.

The large one moves a fair distance away and the one with the handgun shoots at him. The gun doesn't make the standard loud bang as it fires. Instead it makes a more muffled noise.

The large one stands uninjured and yells down the hall "I don't feel anything!"

"Just a moment!" Mark yells back. He flips a little switch on his weapon and the large boy goes still. As Mark moves a small joystick on his weapon the boy follows.

"It works!" Says the one with the dark green clothes, "Let's turn it off."

Immediately after it turns off the boy walks back over to the group and explains that he was completely under Mark's control. After this Mark gives the boys who didn't get shot at clips of ammo. "Here are the mind-control rounds." He says, and the three other boys leave.

"That's what we were doing." Mark says, finally answering your question.

You decide that's enough watching them for now and decide to go get something to eat. Sadly you only have burritos, damn it Snoop!

END OF CHAPTER 21


	22. You Had One Job!

You are now Nathan. After helping Mark test his new weapon you, Jeremy, and Brandon head off with him to meet with the new penguin in charge of the heist.

As you arrive you see Monado boy and the small spork nerd waiting for you. Along side them stands Duncan. The meet is quickly started and rushed through in order to start the mission quickly. The basic plan is to have Duncan cause a distraction with his monster strength as Alex breaks into the security room. From there it's up to Jon and Brandon to get the prisoner penguin out in one piece without having life-support fail on them on the way out. You and Mark are on command duty while Jeremy works on get away plans.

"So," says the little penguin debriefing your team, "Let's start a jailbreak!"

In about ten minutes everything is under way. Duncan is currently making prison guards shit bricks and Alex is sneaking his way to the security room to take the cameras under his control.

"Alright, security guard down," you hear over the radio, "I can see everything. Including the amount of bloodied guards left by Duncan."

"Good!" You say, "Get the second team in the building." You order over the radio.

The second team drops in and begins heading through the air vents to get to the medical ward.

"Fucking vents!" You hear.

"I don't think it's that bad." Jon replies to the remark.

"But you're small. This is not enjoyable for me."

"Then why are you on the vent team?"

"Because I can tell which vents are bad ideas to exit from."

The arguement about cramped spaces is interrupted by Alex.

"Hey. I found something interesting on the cameras."

"What have you found?" Mark asks.

"Looks like they're keeping guards in a certain section of the prison. They won't go to stop Duncan's rampage."

"Why?"

"According to a map of the prison that's where they're keeping high-priority inmates."

"What's so important about that?" You ask.

"I was hoping Mark could explain that to me." Alex replies.

"I don't know what kind of prisoners they could be hiding that are that important." Mark says.

"What about the prince?" Says a nearby penguin.

"They wouldn't keep the prince in a prison like this one." Mark ponders for a moment. "They'd have kept him in one of the higher security ones."

"This isn't maximum security?!" Jon chimes in.

"No, this is low security for this place."

"They just transferred the prince to a nearby prison recently," The penguin adds, "But they refused to disclose which one."

"Who is this prince?" You ask finally.

"He tried to rebel against the current leaders of the empire. So naturally they threw him in jail."

"Thank you, penguin man."

"You want me to rampage toward them?" Duncan suggests.

"No, let team air vents deal with it." Marks replies.

"Fuck!" Brandon screams, causing the radio to emit loud ass static. "What's even worse is nothing bad's gonna happen if we do it. I just don't wanna fucking do it."

You hear a loud clank as a grate hits the ground. Team vents has made it.

"I say we just burn the place down and pick up whatever prisoners we're looking for out of the emerging croud!" Alex sounds like he's thought this one through.

"Do you honestly think that would work?" You ask.

"No, I just wanna watch it burn!"

"Of course you do."

"I have an idea!" Mark bursts out.

"This plan better not be as stupid as your plan to go to the deep web!" You say. That was not a good idea in the first place, but he fucking did it!

"No! We just need Brandon to hit one of the guards with a mind control round, then I can walk the guards past with Sapphire and team vents can head to check for the prince."

"I second the motion to do less work!" Brandon comments. Without anybody's input you hear a small pop as the mind control device leaves the barrel of his gun followed by Mark pulling up a screen showing where he pilots a penguin guard.

"Hey, they know someone's here!" Alex says in a panicked voice.

"What's happening?" You ask.

"They're sending guards to Jon and Brandon's location."

"Well, we already screwed up this mission, why not just fight your way past them!"

"We're kinda already on it." Jon replies.

"Okay, at this point we should just let Alex set the prison on fire on top of it all!"

"I already did!"

"What the hell?!"

"I thought it was a good idea."

"No! It's not a good idea to set a building full of people in cells on fire!"

"Well when you put it that way it sounds like a dumb idea!"

"It is a dumb idea!"

"Fuck it!" Duncan yells, "I'll take care of the guards. Have the Tweedle Fuck-up and Tweedle Dumbass save his royal birdness."

"Which one am I?" Jon asks.

"Shut up and save the penguin or you'll be Tweedle dead!"

"Hey," Alex calls in, "Who's the purple guy?"

"What purple guy?" You ask reluctantly.

"He's killing guards with a sweet golden sword."

"I don't even care anymore, as long as he's helping just leave him alone."

"We have one royal bird!" Brandon reports, "Jeremy!"

With that Jeremy dissapears and reappears with team vents and captain arson in tow.

"Okay, how did you do that?" You ask.

"Time powers!" Jeremy answers, "Shi-ka-ka!"

"What the fuck was that noise?" Brandon asks looking at Jeremy like he just suggested burning down the prison.

"It was the noise of my magical time powers."

"It was the noise of stupidity given physical form."

"Shi-ka-ka!"

"Seriously," you say, "Stop making that sound."

"Hey, need a getaway!" Duncan yells over the little radio.

With a quick temporal change and a "shi-ka-ka" Jeremy gets Duncan out as well.

"Is this the prince we were looking for?" Jon asks as he looks the penguin up and down.

"Yes! It is certainly the prince!" Yells one of the penguins.

All of the small birds join in a cheer, "Hail to the prince! Hail to the prince!"

"Well, I guess we did it." Mark says. We got the prince out and Sapphire is on her way here in a stolen ambulance. Thanks guys."

"With that done we have other stuff to do!" Brandon says.

"Like what?"

"Well I promised Alex a working Monado. So let's get him a working Monado."

"Not to be rude," you interrupt, "But I don't exactly trust the guy who set the prison on fire with the sword of a god."

"He's going to be a god soon." Brandon reminds the team.

"That is honestly scary."

"Anyway, if you guys don't wanna help, I can figure out how to get it to work without you."

"Okay, have fun with that."

"Alright, let's go Alex!"

With that they walk away to make stupid decisions.

END OF CHAPTER 22


	23. Time Heals All Wounds

You are now Cherry, and you're growing tired of your brother's shenanigans! After you meet up in the dream bubble he rudely vanishes in the middle of a doomed Angelica's story. Now he comes back bloodied and covered in feathers.

"Where the hell have you been?" You demand.

"I was just paying a visit to our new friends." He responds.

"What new friends?"

"The ones in the session we're going to."

"You did? Did you see dad? Did you find the guy we're looking for?"

"Yes, I did. No, didn't see him. Didn't get to speak with him. I was busy killing sword wielding penguins."

"Why would you hurt innocent penguins?"

"From the looks of it they were prison guards, not the most innocent of professions."

"Maybe they were just hard working penguins trying to get by in this cruel world!"

"That actually sounds like some kinda crappy movie."

"I think that would be a pretty good movie."

"Happy Feet 3: Life Sucks Kids!"

"Anyway, back to how you got there. How did you get there?"

"I was able to detect a disturbance in the force."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"No, I could feel someone's immense rage. I used it as a way to channel my mind ghost thing there."

"They must have been pretty angry for you to detect it, then use it as a way to materialize yourself."

"Yeah. I think they set the prison on fire!"

"Are these really the kinda people dad wants us to find?"

"I already like these guys!"

"You just like more anger to fuel your powers."

"I resent that remark!"

"No, it's totally false. I mean you only ripped up the black King so bad his minions barely recognized him."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Do you even remember that fight or were you too consumed by anger?"

"Well it is pretty hazy."

"You took on the black king's rage and used it as a weapon against him. That only made him angrier, which only made you stronger. You're one hell of a fighter when you get mad."

"Yeah, that sounds like me."

"I think you did most of the work during that fight, and Tim uses a fucking minigun as a weapon."

"Yeah, I'm pretty awesome!"

"As much as you'd like it to be, today isn't compliment Sam day."

"Can we make that a holiday?"

"No, we can't, haven't, and won't."

"Damn!"

"Hey," you hear Tim yell, "Guess who I met?"

"Jesus?" You ask rhetorically.

"No. I met that Brandon guy you're looking for!"

"Yeah, so did Sam."

"Did he have a full conversation with him too?"

"Now this is a story I want to hear."

"Aw! I thought we could discuss what festivities could be held on compliment Sam day." Sam whines.

"What is that?" Tim asks.

"That's Sam's new fake holiday." You reply.

Tim then fills you in on his conversation with Brandon.

"So," you begin after Tim finishes his story, "It sounds like they have an incredibly unstable and partially psychotic team."

"Yep." Tim answers quickly, "But then again most of our team is crazy too." This time he looked straight at Sam.

"I knew I liked these guys!" Sam adds with a large grin on his face.

"Anyway, they've met your dad!"

With the mention of the word dad everything else fades from your mind. They've met with him...he's alive, and better yet, he's there.

"Let's try to keep the talk off the old man." Sam suggests. This has been a real issue within the team. There have been more than a few fights over whether or not tracking down your father was worth it, and if so for what reason. Sam and Anelica believe it's better for the team is you execute him for his crimes. You, Elise, and Will want to hear his side of the story before jumping to conclusions. While Tim...well, Tim just kinda keeps the ship running.

"Yeah, Sam's right." Tim remarks, "We should try to talk about some less serious stuff. Met any cool dead people?"

"If we're talking about less serious stuff, let's talk about compliment Sam day!"

"No!" You and Tim say in unison.

"Fine then, I have an actual question then."

"What?" You ask.

"Once we get to this session...then what? Like after we deal with dad in whatever way we agree upon. What do we do after that?"

"I never really thought about it. Do you think the other group will let us go with them to their new universe?"

"Is that our plan? Just ask nicely and hope that we get invited to the crazy parade?"

"What else can we do? We have no other options really."

"We could always kill them all then take their universe."

"What is wrong with you!?"

"I didn't think you would like that option, but we need a backup plan!"

"I guess we could get their space player to try and send us back to our session."

"So we just go on another long cruise on the S.S. Hellhole back to our session. Just go back and go 'Hey Bill! We're back to actually do shit now!'?"

"I guess."

"There has to be a better way."

"At this point we don't haves much of a choice. We're in too deep."

"Well if all else fails we can just go feed ourselves to the Horrorterrors."

"I think things will work out" Says an unfamiliar voice.

You look up to see a ghost of someone you've never met. He sits on a rock dressed in a Seer of Time god-tier outfit.

"Things always work out," he continues, "But for you it will work out best if you just keep moving forward. The road ahead will be full of trouble and strife, but time heals all wounds."

With that the ghost dissapeared into another bubble.

END OF CHAPTER 23


	24. Fallen Hero

You are now Brandon. You and Alex walk the emmense labyrinth of his planet. The two of you search for his quest bed. The effort has been futile so far and you had to stop at the nearest town to rest the night before.

"We're looking for the bed that makes me god-tier right?" Alex asks breaking the silence of your search.

"So you've been reading the comic?" You question back.

"Yeah, I figured it would be helpful to know what we're trying to do here."

"We're currently trying to find how to get the Monado Aperture to work properly."

"But didn't you say that having me god-tier wouldn't solve the problem?"

"I did, but I didn't say it would do nothing."

"So we just get it to work at low power?"

"No! We get it to work at low power for now."

"That's why we're coming out to the giant maze that is my planet? To get an intended result from unsuccessful means?"

"Well that's not the only reason."

"Why else?"

"The team doesn't quite trust you with power, for good reason. I'm your friend so I'm going to give it to you straight. You're good with a sword and you would be a great part of the team if you would stop trying to set everything on fire. I think giving you a chance to experience real power might cause you to realize that there are other means to solve an issue than burning it down."

"I think fire is a perfectly reasonable solution to a problem."

"That's the point. You need to realize it's not. Have you heard the saying 'Don't burn your bridges once you've crossed them.'?"

"Yeah."

"Well the saying's right. You can't destroy your chances to go back. We already lost our way back home, you can't lose your way to go back anymore. If you burn your bridges now, there's nothing's left to use to go back. You can't ammend your mistakes.

"Well this conversation just got morbid."

"This game is morbid, Alex. Think about it. We've destroyed our home, destroyed our people. We're the last of the human race, and we're not hanging on a thread, we're hanging on a line of barbed wire."

"Why are you suddenly so depressing?"

"I've been in the dream bubble, I've talked to dead versions of ourselves, I see impending death and sadness. It's a little much on a person's mind."

"Is it really that bad of a situation?"

"Yes, it is. Do you know what it's like to know that it's your job to keep people alive? Your job to watch your friends die, then come face to face with it and win? It's painful."

"I didn't know it was that bad."

"You'll have your own hardships ahead too. A void player deals with the dark and lonely. I can't say I envy you."

The two of you arrive on a small hill, atop sits Alex's quest bed.

"So I need to die now?"

"Yeah. If you can't kill yourself I can always off you if you want."

"No, I'll kill myself. I'm planning to beat Nate to seppuku."

"Good luck. I'll be over here."

You watch as Alex sits on the edge of his bed and takes the blade of his sword through his stomach. You'd turn around to avoid seeing it, but you already saw it happen hours ago. He falls back into the quest bed, soaking the covers in blood from his half open torso. You smirk for a short moment when a Marco joke crosses your mind.

You watch as your little plan takes effect. An appearifier you brought fires up it makes a soft zapping sound as Alex appears in his Mage outfit. He looks at you then suddenly falls to his knees in pain. His skin turns grey and he screams in strange and unpronounceable words. He's gone grimdark!

"Alex!" You yell at him trying to think of what to do.

He responds in more incomprehensible noises.

"Alex! What happened?"

He stands up without a sound and reaches for his dead body. He picks up the Monado Aperture and holds it in his hands. To your surprise the blade of light comes out and he holds it in front of him with the smile of a madman. He swings the blade at you and the only words you can make out are "Monado Purge". You are filled with pain as you fall to the ground you begin to see a vision, but it immediately stops. The bastard ended your visions with that purge!

He goes for a slash and you dodge in time. You need to get out of here! You begin to run and get ahead a little, but he begins to catch up as you run out of breath. Damn your low stamina! You can't win. You need to go with your emergency plan. You quickly hit him in the gut then take his glasses. The fool's blind as a bat without them. You take the moment while his vision is blurred to lose him in the maze.

After hours of walking you finally find a town and have them point you to the gate that leads to his home. Once you get to his home you head through his second gate back to your house.

You need to gather the others. You need to stop him. Suddenly you stop in your tracks as an image fills your head. The team standing around a dead Alex. If you get the other's help, he'll die. You're gonna have to find some other way to stop him.

END OF CHAPTER 24


	25. Life and Death

You are now Cherry. You walk through the dream bubbles after your conversation about your brother's new holiday. You walk through bubbles that you haven't been in before. Here you were thinking you'd seen all of the memory bubbles your team would let you enter. You come across a house with large iron doors. You attempt to open the left door but the job doesn't even budge, you reason that it's locked. You try the right door to find the knob turn and the door open. Who keeps only one of the doors locked? You enter the home and turn to close the door behind you and you notice that the door wasn't unlocked, the lock's broken. As for the other door it doesn't even seem to be locked, you turn the knob and that doesn't move, this door doesn't even work as a door. Whoever owns this house needs a better door than this.

You turn back to look about the house. You see a living room in front of you, a dinning room to the right, and a set of stairs to the left. You head to the living room and look around. All that is here is a chair, a couch, a love-seat, a small table, and a television. Nothing here stands out so you head back toward the door. As you make your way to go up the stairs you notice a young man appear in the dinning room. You go to the dinning room to greet him.

As you approach you look at him to realize that this is the boy—Brandon—from the photo your dad left you. He looks at you puzzled then looks around and finally looks up at the roof and groans.

"What?" You ask, "Am I not what you were expecting?"

"Frankly I don't know who you are." He says in a rude tone.

"I'm the one who's looking for my father."

"Oh! You're Cherry."

"Yeah, and you're Brandon."

"With introductions out of the way I need to get going."

"Get going where exactly?"

"One of my friends is in trouble and I think a ghost I know can help."

"Maybe I can help. I'm good at fixing things. Healing wounds."

"Fine. I could use whatever help I can get."

"So what is the issue?"

"My session's void player has gone grimdark."

"Well...that certainly is a problem."

"Just as I thought you can't help."

"Actually I think I can."

"How can you help from a spaceship?"

"I can help you while I'm asleep actually. If my brother can appear in your session so can I!"

"So your brother is the purple guy."

"If that's what you wish to call him."

"Anyway, how can you appear in our session?"

"I need a catalyst. Something to channel my power."

"Yes, I know what a catalyst is. The question is what should I use as the catalyst?"

"Here, I'll give you something." You reach to your wrist and remove your bracelet. A gold band with three large jewels forming a line across it. "This bracelet was a gift from my boyfriend. I'm sure he won't mind it missing for a little while."

"So I just wake up with this and then you can try and use it to reach my team's session?"

"Yep."

"Alright. Time to go!"

"Whoa! Slow down!"

"What now?"

"I've helped you. Now you help me."

"How can I possibly help you?"

"I want information."

"Fine. I'll stay and chat. When we're done talking you can help me save my friend."

"First things first. Where's my father and how is he?"

"He's well and he would like to keep his location disclosed. He's not ready to face his family for his crimes."

"Fair enough, but he's going to have to face me and my brother once we arrive at your session. Now I want to know about you and your friends."

"Well there are seven of us. All guys. We're all awesome."

"That's a useless discription."

"If you want more info you need to ask more specific questions."

"Alright. What do you do for your team."

"I fight for my friends. I have the ability to see bad things to come and it's my job to stop them from happening."

"Sounds like an important job."

"We all have important jobs."

"Name some others."

"Our friend Jeremy, his job is to prevent the entire timeline collapsing."

"So you have a team of badasses and I get my team of just general fuckups."

"My team has no shortage of fuckups."

"There is no way your team could be dumber than mine."

"Wanna bet?"

"You honestly think you can win this? Alright, before we started the game I had to explain to my brother why fancy Santa kind is not a good Specibus."

"My friend Jon uses spoons and my friend Mark uses game controllers."

"Well played, but did your teammates ever try build a cannon that shoots perfectly generic objects?"

"Did any of your teammates duplicate the trickster lollipop simply to get free zillium then have it all fuck up and have everyone turn into tricksters?"

"Anyone in your session find their dream-self then try to kill it for dominance?"

"God-teir by seppuku!"

"Replaced my shotgun shells with confetti!"

"Made a talking spork named Reginald that has a code of valor!"

"Alright! You win! You're team is certainly full of idiots too."

"Neither of our teams are full of idiots. Just people who do stupid things."

"So idiots?"

"Yeah, but phrased in a nicer way. That way you can say it to their faces and they won't get as mad."

"I'll have to keep that in mind."

"I have a question for you now."

"What?"

"What does your group intend to do once you reach our session?"

"Find my dad. Have him answer for his crimes. We don't know from there."

"I'm asking because I think we could make room for six others in our new universe."

"You mean it!?"

"Yeah. I'm sure the others wouldn't mind. Not to mention you're going to need some place to go after you deal with your father and I don't think your team is up for another long rocket ride."

"Thanks! I really appreciate it!"

"No need to thank me. It's the least I could do for you if you can cure Alex."

"You still don't know whether or not I can."

"I'm not about to doubt a sylph's healing abilities."

"Well then, I look forward to working with you. Now you need to wake up."

After you two are done speaking he dissapears and you can feel the presence of the catalyst and focus on it. You open your eyes and you are greeted by Brandon.

END OF CHAPTER 25


	26. Temporary Homicide

You are now Brandon once again. It seems to me like Brandon has been a fuckload of chapters lately. Probably because the perspective of Jeremy in this situation would be boring and stupid, and this story already has those two factors in spades. Unless you somehow find this interesting. In which case you might need a mental exam. This story sucks ass. Don't worry though things will get interesting around chapter 437. That's right this story is gonna have a chapter 437 even if I just have to randomly name some chapter in the early 30s "Chapter 437"! Anyway back to the story.

You're Brandon and you're walking down the stairs from the second floor of your house with Cherry following behind. Once the two of you reach the bottom of the steps you hear small feet with claws scratching across the floors. It's your two little dogs, time to hear them bark loudly at the stranger then piss off your parents. To your surprise they don't bark at Cherry, instead they run up to her and start begging for attention. They usually bark angrily at strangers. You dismiss it as the fact that they haven't come into contact with a stranger that's a literal god.

"Cute dogs!" Cherry says as she picks the gray one up, "What breed are they?"

"The black one's a poodle and they grey one's a maltipoo."

"A maltipoo?"

"A Maltese mixed with a poodle. Can you stop playing with the dogs now, we need to save Alex."

"But cute dogs!"

"But friend who currently is trying to murder my team!"

"Fine, but I want a clone of one of the dogs as payment."

"You want me to clone one of my dogs and give it to you?"

"Yes! I think they would make a perfect team mascot!"

"Fine! After you cure Alex!"

You two head up to your second gate. You're gonna have to go past all of your co-players in order to get to Alex's planet.

After lots of gate hopping and running past several confused teammates you get to Alex's planet.

"Where is he?" Cherry asks.

"He's got legs. Stands to reason he's gonna move around the maze."

"Can we track him somehow?"

"I can sense pain and death this way." You say pointing toward a path through the maze.

"Lovely."

You walk until you reach a torn apart village. Several chameleons emerge from their hiding spots when they see you.

"It's the Heir!" Yells one.

"The Heir can help us!" Yells another.

"What happened?" You ask.

"The Mage went crazy!" Yells one lizard.

"You have to stop him!" Yells another.

"We're working on it." You address the crowd, "Where did he go?"

They all point to another path. You head down it until you hear something nearby. It sounds like murmurs.

You immediately get a vision. An attack! Alex is here! You quickly move to the side as a blade of light lands next to you.

"Here's the patient!" You yell at Cherry.

"I'm on it." She yells back while raising her hands toward Alex.

Before she can hit him with a blast of what the doctor ordered Alex dodges and throws up a Monado Shield.

"It's no use!" She yells, "I need you to hold him still for a few seconds!"

"You want me to try and keep the guy with a sword still using a rifle?"

"Just shut up and do it!"

You wait for a vision and get a clear view of what he's gonna do next. He lunges forward and you move around the stab and smack him in the skull with the butt of your rifle.

"There! He's down."

Cherry raises her hands again and this time hits Alex dead on with her "Healing attack" if that's even a thing. Alex starts to spasm uncontrollably and finally falls still.

"Did you heal him or kill him?" You ask angrily.

"Umm...both."

"What the fuck does that mean?"

"There was only way to remove the curse from him was to kill him so I used healing powers and did what was necessary to heal him."

"If we just had to kill him I could have done that alone."

"But you would have killed him permanently."

"How so?"

"He attacked that village. It would have been a just death."

"So now you've killed him for good?"

"No. He's just legally dead. I had his heart stopped then restarted."

"So he's okay?"

"Yeah. He should be fine."

As if on que Alex sits up and rubs his head. "What happened?"

"You went grimdark." You reply bluntly.

"Like Rose?"

"Yeah."

"Who's she?"

"I'm Cherry." She answers.

"Brandon I thought we killed all the humans that weren't in our homes at the time we started the game. Where'd she come from?"

"I'm from another session. I'm also the person who healed you."

"Thanks."

"Oh, and cool sword."

"Yeah. Brandon helped me make it."

"You used it well it combat."

"Wait it worked!?"

"Yeah," you answer, "It started working after you went grimdark."

To test it Alex picks the Monado up off the stone ground and lifts it. The blade emerges at full glow and the symbol in the middle of the weapon is clearly visible.

"I guess we got what we wanted out of this!"

"Yeah, I guess we did."

"What were you trying to do?" Cherry asks.

"The Monado didn't work, we were trying to get it powered up."

"Well I guess you got your wish. Now where's my father?"

"Can't tell you. Besides, we agreed your payment was to be one cloned dog and a pass for your team to enter our universe."

"Well I'm already here, so I want to know where he is!"

"See Cherry making deals is a lot like being in a fight. You're inderestimating your opponent."

"What do you mean?"

"Think about it. I'm in the position to be making demands. Not you. I can send you out of here by simply destroying the bracelet or shooting you. You'd dissapear and be completely unharmed however you'd lose a gift from a loved one and a cloned dog."

"Fine! I'll take the dog...but I want the catalyst to stay here! I want the free right to return and search for my father here!"

"You'll need to make a better deal then that."

"If you keep the catalyst, I'll help out by healing your team in important battles."

"Sorry, but I don't like those terms." You throw down the bracelet and smash it. Cherry's dream ghost dissipates into the air.

END OF CHAPTER 26


	27. Daddy Issues

You are now Cherry. You have arrived back in the dream bubbles, but in a memory you haven't seen before.

You walk along an empty road with bright city lights far down the path. You look over the right side to see the shore, framed by the vast, endless ocean. You look over to the left and see trees brimmed with beautiful white and pink flowers. Cherry blossoms. As you look up the path again you see something in the tree-line up ahead.

As as you get closer you see a crater rimmed by scorched flowers. You look down the large dent in the earth and see a man standing at the bottom looking at the rock that caused the impact.

"Stay back!" He calls up to you without turning around.

"It looks perfectly safe." You respond, a little confused by this stranger's cause for concern.

"It's not a safety issue."

"Then what's so wrong with me getting a better look at the meteor?"

"Just...just go away!"

"Is this a memory you don't want others in. If so I can leave."

"I'm perfectly fine with others in this memory. I don't want _you _in this memory."

"What quarrel do I have with you?"

"Just leave!"

"No! I'm going down there!"

"Go away, Sakura!"

That word hits you like a ton of bricks. "Dad?" You ask.

"Damn!" You hear him mutter under his breath.

"Dad! Is that you?"

"Just leave me be! I'm not your father!"

"But dad...it's me...it's Cherry!"

"I know who you are! I don't want to see you!"

"How can you say that to your own daughter!?"

"If I wanted to talk to you, I'd have contacted you already!"

"What's wrong with you?! I came all the way out here after you left me all those messages about where to find you! I flew through the furthest ring to get here, and _this_ is how we are reunited as a family?!"

"Don't you get it? I wasn't sending you to find me! Was sending you to the session you're going to!"

"Oh! The session full of assholes and liars!"

"They're not like that!"

"Yes they are! They're probably all like that Brandon guy!"

"Don't you talk about your father like that!"

"Father...wait...what? You're my father."

"Shit! Fine, I'll tell you. That's because Brandon and I are the same person."

"What, like he grows up to be you?"

"No," he turns around and looks at you to show you his blank, lifeless eyes. "I'm him from a doomed timeline. A timeline where we needed to scratch the session."

"There's no way! You aren't like that asshole, and...you...you can't be...you can't be dead." At this point it's too much and you can't help but cry.

"I am, and I am. The session I came from scratched and created you and your friend's session. I told you to go to the session you're headed to to save you."

"You want me to go to that shithole and then say it's for my safety!?"

"Sakura, think abou-"

"No! You don't call me that name! I've always hated it!"

"I am your father and you will listen!"

"No! You're not my dad! You're a liar wearing the mask of an honest man!"

"And I'm also the man who saved you and your friends from imminent death! By making you part of the alpha timeline you are now essential to its stability!"

"What if I wanted to die?"

"I know full well that you don't!"

"You don't know me! You act like you do, but you never did!"

"You're wrong. I have the memories of two lives where I knew you. One where you were my mother, and the other where you were my daughter."

"And with all that time you learned nothing about what I want!"

"You want your friends to survive. Especially Will."

"You...that's wrong!"

"No, it's completely accurate. You couldn't bare the idea of harm coming to him. Just imagine it now. Imagine all the timelines where he died. Imagine all of the world's that died because he got reckless."

Images fill your head of Will either in horrible pain or torn apart beyond recognition. "Stop! Stop making me see these things!"

"No, this is what I was protecting you from! You chose to stay in this memory, so you choose to face what horrors come with it!"

"So you show me images of my boyfriend dying?"

"I show you what your fate was! I show you what I killed all of my friends and family for! So you wouldn't have to actually live through this! And how do you repay me?!"

"I don't owe you anything! You think I owe you for deciding my fate for me?!"

"That is a parent's job!"

"No! It's a parent's job to teach their child! To let them decide their own future!"

"You actually believe that crap?"

"It's not crap!"

"I know it is! I can see the fate of one of your party members being decided by their parent."

"Which one?"

"If I were to tell you then this would not become their fate, and you wouldn't learn a lesson."

"Still trying to teach me lessons? Like I want to learn anything from you!"

"I am your father and it is my job!"

"I already told you! You're not my father!"

"So you will accept my brother as your father then? Good. He's a much more suited parent."

"I bet he is."

"And to think that my wife and I were so happy when I brought you home."

"Are you trying to pull a sob story out of a hat?"

"To think that I even gave you the name of a flower as beautiful as the cherry blossom. In truth you are nothing but a fly trap. You lure in others and lead then to their demise."

"I am not like that!"

"Wrong! It runs in the family. I did it. Your brother has done it. You already have done it!"

"What do you mean?"

"The session you are headed to. It will spell out demise for some, and happiness for others."

"Then I'll turn the ship around!"

"Your team will think you're crazy, they'll never do it. Even if you do, then they'll all die."

Your mind is filled with more images of your friends dying.

"Stop! I'll go to the session!"

"That's a good girl."

"Bastard!"

"As evil as you think I am, you still haven't noticed what memory I wish to relive."

"Fine then! Humor me! What memory is this?"

"This is when I found you."

"So you like to remember the times when I couldn't speak?"

"Don't be rude. I'm trying to be nice."

"Why should I? You're an asshole!"

"I know that. I also know that you will later come to accept some form of me as family."

"How can you know that? Do you believe in fairy tales?"

"You are forgiving, and too caring. I know you believe that all hearts harbor hidden kindness."

"So what if I do?"

"You need to face this isn't the truth."

"Why? Because of people like you?"

"No, because of people who you will come to later meet."

"So some of the assholes from your session?"

"My session was filled with good people, and so is the version of it you are headed to."

"If they're such good people then why did you fail where they succeeded? What difference was between your two sessions that would make them more suited to victory other than them being more ruthless?"

"We failed because I have only one brother. The session you are headed to is one where I had a half brother born of the ones I grew up knowing as my parents."

"So, technically that would make him my son?"

"Genetically, yes. His name is Duncan and he is the one reason why they lived and I died in a doomed world."

"Is he that strong?"

"I'd say that he is stronger than a denizen, even without god-tiering."

"I can see how he keeps them alive."

"It's not just that. He is an important person to the progression of them as people. He is the reason why their version of me has the ability to see losses. He wished for the power to avoid another defeat at the hands of his brother. All a matter of sibling rivalry."

"So because you didn't have the drive to win, you developed different powers."

"Yes, because I didn't have a goal, an objective, I lost sight of what was important."

"Which was?"

"Proctecting my friends. He learned to hate defeat and grow bitter at experience of it. He hates to lose. Because of his hatred for defeat he fights so fiercely to avoid it."

"So all he wants to do is win."

"Yes. However this is not the only change led on by Duncan's existence. At our time of need our leader couldn't step up to the plate, in the other session Duncan slapped some sense into him. Where Duncan sees weakness he exposes it and destroys it. Being a heart player he saw weakness in our leader's heart and got him to realize what was at stake."

"Then I guess I stand corrected, maybe they aren't all assholes."

"No. Duncan's a huge asshole."

"Why did I think he wouldn't be?"

"The only difference is that calling him out on it would be like asking an elephant to step on your ribcage."

"So this guy with monster strength is the only reason why they lived?"

"Absolutely."

"So they're not only all assholes, but they're all assholes who can't fight."

"Ah, yes, because I see that healing people killed off so many enemies on your planet."

"Shut up! We're still stronger than them!"

"Yeah, I mean you don't need an incredibly overpowered rage player with a healer that can reverse death like its no big deal to win a fight."

"Fine! I see your point! Still, I have one question."

"What?"

"Why would sending us to the alpha timeline make us survive? Wouldn't that just make another doomed timeline?"

"Normally it would, but my friends and I are not a group to underestimate. It was a simple task really. Mind player creates plan. Doom player prevents the group from finding their deaths in the furthest ring. Space player plots course to right place. Time player stabilizes the timeline."

"That's all I wanted to know."

"What? Leaving already? I thought you wanted to stay in this memory and speak to dear old dad."

"As I already said, you're not my father."

"Fine then, if I'm not your dad, then you can call me Grimm."

END OF CHAPTER 27


	28. The Ends

You are now Duncan. You are speaking with the shit your brother refers to as Nate.

"So what are we doing?" You ask a little annoyed that he called you out here to his weird planet of instruments.

"One of the tribe leaders says we need your help for something." He replies as if you know what that means.

"Tribe leaders?" You ask.

"My planet is divided into several warring tribes. There are thirty-seven tribes in total who have each taken up one of two sides. Seventeen have taken up the flag of the group known as the 'Songblades'. The other twenty have taken up the cause of the 'Tunehearts'."

"Sound like shitty band names."

"I know, it apparently has to do with the fact that it's the Land of Conflict and Melody, and bullshit names that have to do with music."

"Oh, no I know about stupid names based off of the planet's name. On my brother's planet they have their elite soldiers called the 'Starfang', because the name 'Flashy Bullshit' must have been already taken."

"Ha. Good one."

"Seriously though why are they fighting and who are we helping?"

"They're fighting over land naturally. The tribes fight for new land which they then separate amongst one another."

"They have a whole fucking planet. How can they need more land?"

"It's not so much that they need the land as they want to show their power, the one with the most land has the most power."

"Okay, so who are we helping?"

"The Songblades."

"Cool, gotta love an underdog!"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"So why are we helping them? If you ask me we should just kill all the assholes who won't agree to shut up and quit fighting."

"While that may seem like a good idea it wouldn't solve the world's problems."

"I dunno, I think you guys solved Earth's problems by destroying it."

"That's not exactly a good solution."

"But it gets results."

"That's not all that matters. If Hitler won World War II, would that make the Holocaust okay?"

"To the world, yeah. If Hitler won there wouldn't be any arguement, the world would have just gone, 'Oh, Hitler won. Time to march outside and Seig Heil!'."

"That still wouldn't make it okay."

"It's all how you look at it. America won the war so we all point fingers at Hitler as the big bad guy. I guarantee that in a world where America lost the scientists who made the atomic bomb would have been looked at as the bad guy."

"They were bad, they built an atomic bomb!"

"See, you know that, but association with them is better than of that with Hitler, because they won. Sure Hitler sent the Jews to live under horrible conditions and killed many more people, but the atomic bomb destroyed an entire city in the blink of an eye. The fact of numbers only matters to the loser. If the Allies lost, the number six million would mean nothing to the world."

"I still don't get your point, I know that 'history is written by the victor', but how does that justify the holocaust?"

"It doesn't, to us. As you said, history is written by the victors. People learn from history, they grow based off of cause and effect. Your planet is no different."

"So you're saying that we don't justify the holocaust simply because Hitler lost, so we understand that it was a terrible thing?"

"Yes. In another world if he won then people would revere him as a hero, see his actions as just."

"So what does this have to do with my planet?"

"Think about it. If one side completely wipes out the other then the winning side will be revered as heroes. You need to think wisely about how you approach this. If you weigh too heavily to favor one side they will see the others as failures in the eyes of their god. However if you don't pay attention to the conflict at all then they will decide that their world is no longer under the rule of a god, they will destroy each other immediately."

"So my planet is screwed!"

"Well, those are only two options."

"Well what are my other options?"

"Well, I just gave you one. The other is to deny what you fear. To deny that your people must suffer, and in doing so, make it so they don't have to."

"So I need to fight to protect them?"

"If that's what you think will solve the issue."

"Then I guess I need to find some way for them to agree on a treaty."

"You don't need to make them agree on anything. You're a god to them, make them listen, and if they don't, punish them."

Before he can respond you are interrupted by the annoying little Skype jingle for when you're getting a call.

"It's Alex."

He answers with his glasses he mixed with his computer to result in an even shittier version of Google Glass.

"Hey...no...why?...oh, cool you got the sword to work...I will die when I'm ready to die...no, you shouldn't murder your friends to get them cool powers, that's not a nice thing to do...wait, you and Brandon did _what_!?"

"What trouble are they getting into?"

"It seems that Alex and Brandon have murdered Mark and Jeremy in order to make them god-tier!"

"What does that mean?"

"It means they killed them and they got cool powers when they died, then came back to life as immortal gods."

"I don't see the problem here."

"The problem is that they are murdering their teammates!"

"Dude, remember the whole conversation we just had about history and shit. The ends justify the means."

"I didn't get that out of that conversation."

"Then you weren't following very well."

"They're still murdering their teammates!"

"Dude, they get results! I think that's useful. If you're gonna keep bitching about it then I guess I'm not needed to help the red panda soldiers."

"Fine, let's go!"

You walk for another few minutes and reach a city built in the bell of a giant tuba.

"Ah! The Prince arrives with the Knight in tow!" Says a furry, city guardsman, "I will lead you to the king!" You follow the happy little creature to a castle in the back of the instrument.

You are led inside to a throne room with a royal looking animal atop a brass throne.

"Perfect!" Cheers the panda king, "Now you have a chance!"

"A chance at what?" Nathan asks.

"Well, to kill Minerva of course!"

"You want us to fight my denizen?"

"Yes! Truly if we can obtain access to the Library of Minerva then we are sure to win the war!"

"Oh," you observe, "If I'm just being used as weapon against some other little shit's enemy then you can count me out. Maybe I can go help my brother murder people."

"No! Wait! The Prince cannot do it alone!"

"Then get his other little shit friends to help, not me! He has to fight his own battles!"

And with that you walk out of that giant tuba and head home. As you walk through the emmense fields of this planet you get a phone call.

"Hey." You answer.

"It's me." Brandon says from the other end of the line.

"Yeah, I have caller ID."

"I need you to gather Nate and Jon."

"Why? You gonna kill them too?"

"No, I'm going to fight Thantos."

"Who?"

"He's my denizen. A denizen is like an evil god that you have to fight to become stronger."

"So what's so bad about Thantos that you can't fight him alone?"

"He is the Greek angel of death according to my research into the subject. He's not gonna be a pushover like you were."

"Oh ha ha! You beat me once and suddenly you get bragging rights!"

"That's not how it works?"

"Whatever. I'll get the assholes and bring them to the house."

"Perfect!"

"Oh, and I'm not helping you in the fight."

"That's fine."

END OF CHAPTER 28


	29. Forgiveness, Trust, and Abandonment

You are now Angelica. You're standing around in a dream bubble waiting for something to happen or someone to show up. Almost as if on cue, Cherry appears.

"Hey," you say to your friend, "What's up?"

"There's something I need to tell you." She says in a grim tone.

"What's up? Is someone hurt? Are Sam and Elise fighting again? Should I kick their asses?"

"No, it's nothing like that. I found my dad."

"That's great how is he? I hope he's—"

"He's dead."

"Oh, I'm...I'm sorry to hear that."

"That's not all, it turns out that our session is the product of a scratch."

"So, we're all our parent's parent's?"

"Yes."

"Oh god that's weird to think about!"

"To make it even worse, the session that created ours is another version of the session we're headed to."

"That's bad news? Cherry, that's possibly the best news that could accompany those statements!

"No, it's not, the session we're going to is full of assholes who look like our dead parents."

"I have a question for you then. If these guys are assholes, then how can they be genetically the same as our parents? Did you forget that our parents were pretty nice people?"

"These people have grown up in a different time, on a different Earth. They're different people."

"Exactly! That's the conclusion I wanted you to draw! They're different people. They're not supposed to be our parents, and we're not supposed to be theirs."

"But from the ones I've met they are terrible people!"

"Is that a good judge of character? A few are mean, so they all suck ass?"

"Well, no, but—"

"No 'buts', these are people you should give another chance."

"No! Screw those guys!"

"What did they do to piss you off anyway?"

"I offered them help, and in return I was to get a free pass to search for my dad and a clone of a dog."

"A clone of a dog?"

"They were really cute dogs!"

"Ok."

"Instead, after I healed one of their friends, the younger version of my dad broke the catalyst I used to get to their session and sent me back to the dream bubbles."

"What was the catalyst?"

"The bracelet Will gave me."

"Yeah, that's kinda a dick move, but think about it from his perspective. Some strange girl completes her side of the deal and then, as part of the deal, she's going to stick around your session and possibly ruin entire plans, or even betray you when she finds her dad is dead."

"You're saying he might have known my dad was dead?"

"I'm saying maybe he didn't want you to have to find out, or maybe even he was on orders from your dad."

"No, he couldn't have spoken to my dad, the closest thing in the dream bubbles is Grimm."

"Grimm?"

"More dickish version of my dad who scratched his session, then killed all his friends."

"You said that our parents we're the ones who scratched their session."

"Yeah, but you said that they aren't truly our parents."

"Good point. Why the name Grimm?"

"It's what he chooses to go by."

"Anyway, back to the asshole situation. Either way you look at it, one of the people who you despise cared enough to not want you to have to face your dad's death. If it's Grimm, then that's more reasonable to declare you kid-dad a dick. If it wasn't Grimm's orders then you're even farther off then you were before to call him a dick. Would a dick try to prevent the unnecessary sadness of a total stranger?"

"Fine, I get your point."

"Besides, you're gonna need to get along with the young version if you want to join their session once we get there."

"How did you know that was the plan?"

"Oh please! You led us this far and we haven't all died. I have at least some faith in our fearless leader!"

"That's the third part of the deal with Brandon I made. He agreed to let us join their newly created universe. That's part I hope he keeps true to."

"I'm sure he can't be that big of a douche."

"Alright, you've made your point, I'll try to give them another chance."

"Good, now have you seen a ghost in a breath god-tier?"

"Why?"

"I tried to talk to them and they fled into another bubble, I want to find out why."

"Might be the pre-scratch version of your dad."

"Could be. That only makes me want to talk to them even more!"

"Well good luck finding your dead family!" With that she walked off.

You decide that since you've lost the trail you decide to sit down and read from your book.

You open up to a random page and read to yourself, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you." -Deuteronomy 31:6

"Ha. Sure, whatever, dumb old book."

"You don't much care for it either, huh?" A voice says from over your shoulder. You turn around to face the ghost in blue.

"So I guess I've finally found you." You say to the one who you can determine is definitely your dead father.

"Hey, I asked you a question."

"Oh. No, I guess I don't much believe in things like this anymore."

"Yeah, I kinda stopped believing in it as well. Still had to go to church though."

"You? Not believe in this thing?" You ask as you wave the book to show emphasis.

"Well, in my original world I just didn't much care for it. In your world however I practically breathed the word of Christ."

"I guess the world really does change a person."

"So when did you stop believing?"

"When I died. When I realized that that world was long gone and that I wouldn't have our benevolent creator watching over my shoulder anymore. That was when I realized that if I'm to become a god I can't rely on another one for all my guidance."

"Admit it. You still wanna believe that Earth's creator is watching over you."

"I guess some part of me does, some part of me wants to believe that I have a better fate than dream bubbles. Some place where I can live happily after I die."

"That's the point of immortality though, to not die."

"I guess, but who's to say I won't some day face a heroic or just death?"

"I guess it would be up to you by that point."

"Yeah, it would be."

"You know what I think of that book of yours? I think that it doesn't matter if you believe it. It doesn't matter whether what happened in that book did or didn't happen, all that matters is that you get a good message out of it."

"What message did you get out of it?"

"I learned that it's okay to believe in something greater than yourself, but it's not ok to expect the exact same belief of others. People will believe what they believe and if you wanna believe what that book says then good for you, but just because others won't then that doesn't make them evil."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks, dad."

"It's nothing, however let's drop the heavy talk for now. I have some stuff to tell you."

"Like what?"

"Stuff about where you're going."

"Cool!"

"First things first, they may seem hostile at first but that's just their way of saying hi."

"Noted!"

"Secondly, don't give their Void player any knowledge about any spells or incantations that create fire or lightning."

"Why?"

"Because some people just wanna watch the world burn. Lastly, don't go picking fights with them, they may not look it but they are _much_ more powerful than your team."

"How much more powerful?"

"Sam and Cherry working together could barely take out their weakest member. Their strongest member could kill all of you before you could draw your weapons."

"Who's their strongest members?"

"The space player, Mark. His power comes from his class, he's weak now but by the time you guys get there he would be able to create entire solar systems with the snap of his fingers."

"Got it! They're not evil people, don't give the Void player anything that can start a fire, and don't pick a fight with anyone."

"Good. Now, I need to get going. Sadly this will be the last time we will be able to speak. I wish you good luck." With that he dissapeared into another bubble and you were left alone with that old book of yours.

END OF CHAPTER 29


	30. The Reaper's Crown

You are now Brandon and you stand outside of an emmense castle that waited on the other side of your eighth gate.

"So why are we all here?" Mark asks, "Shouldn't you face your denizen alone?"

"Why do that when we can have a fun team-building exercise?" You reply.

"Because we don't need to help you fight your denizen."

"I'll make you a deal, you guys help me fight my denizen and I'll still be kind enough to warn you when you're going to die?"

"Something tells me that's not an optional deal."

"I don't know it's plenty optional. I just hope you like stab wounds."

"Fine, I'll help."

"I don't really prefer dying so, I guess I'm in." Jeremy says.

"I already went grimdark so I'd rather not add dying to terrible experiences." Alex adds.

"I already died once, rather not again." Jon follows.

"I'll help only because I think you'd actually let us die." Nate remarks.

"What about you, Duncan?" You ask.

"No," he responds, "I think I'll just watch you guys fight this guy. I'm not to scared of dying to be honest."

"Alright, let's go guys!"

You all march into the castle and are greeted by silence. Nobody says anything, this silence is all too unnerving, the absolute absence of sound. It sent a chill down your spine. In spite of this eerie silence you keep moving through the great room. The walls are painted black with great paintings hanging upon them. Each painting depicts a death of some kind. Talk about a morbid dude.

You look forward and see, sitting at the head of the table that stretches the length of the room, a tall man in fine clothes with wings protruding from his back.

"Ah, you have come." Says the man.

"Yes, I have." You reply, "Are you Thantos?"

"Indeed, I am, boy."

"I have come to fight you!"

"I see, but you weren't confident enough to come alone? Fine then, I shall crush you all."

"Look here!" Duncan yells at Thantos, "I can't understand a thing you're saying but I don't like the tone in your voice."

"You're not supposed to understand what he's saying." You say correcting your brother's idiocy.

"Then what the hell is he saying?"

"He says he's gonna defeat us all, but clearly he hasn't seen what we can do!"

You draw your rifle and fire off a few shots but Thantos quickly steps to the side. He doesn't show any change in emotion, he's completely unphased by the attack on him.

"How rude," Thantos says, "Do you know how much it will cost to have those bullet holes filled?"

Before you can reply Thantos is on your side of the room. He makes a swipe with a massive broadsword. Everyone ducks. Alex raises his sword and stops the blow. The only person who was too slow to avoid the attack is Jon.

"Humans are such weak creatures." Thantos says as he looks upon the halved teen.

"He's dead!" Mark observes.

"Well clearly he's dead, Mark. How many people do you know who have survived being chopped in half."

"But how can you be so calm about this, we're doomed now! How can we win the game without a player. Not to mention one of your friends just died and you act so calm about it!"

"Because I this was the vision I told you about!"

"You know this is where he would die, and did nothing!?"

"Mark! Calm the hell down! See, Thantos, what you don't realize is that while humans are weak bodied. We are strong minded!"

"How so?" Thantos asks with a smirk on his face.

"Just watch!"

Jon begins to glow and levitate.

"Well," you continue, "I had an idea. So last night I went to Jon's planet and found his quest bed. I stole the comforter and combined it with his jacket while he slept. Because his jacket was a breath aspect hoodie it looked the same and he put it on in the morning like nothing had changed. So now Jon has died while in contact with his quest bed—or at least part of it!"

Joon then opens his eyes and lands on his feet.

"Well played, human!" Thantos responds with an irritated look on his face, "But can you out-think _this_!" He takes a slash at you with his sword.

"Actually, yes!" You say right as the slash connects. The blade stops when it collides with your side and it begins to wither. "You see, Thantos. I am the Heir of Doom. I am one with demise and death. This means I can turn on the doom powers and anything that touches me will die or decay. Your sword? Now a worthless peice of metal!"

"I see. Well then. Perhaps I shall start fighting seriously."

He draws another sword and lunges forward, his path is cut off by Jeremy though, "Cool move, Brandon, but I don't think showboating is gonna kill this guy."

"Yeah," you reply, "I think it's time to kick this guy's ass!" You raise your rifle and fire. It hits Thantos in the shoulder and he recoils in pain.

"Come on!" Alex yells at Thantos, "Let's see what you've got!" He charges and light clashes against bronze. "Monado Cyclone!" With that an emmense wave of energy comes from Alex and knocks Thantos back.

"You'll have to do better than that to kill me you pathetic bugs!" Thantos roars in anger.

"Fine," you yell at him, "Mark, get ready!" You change ammo type to the mind control rounds and fire one at your brother, who's been standing in the corner watching. It hits and Mark is given control. Your brother's body jumps toward the monster and lands a punch straight to the face. With a loud crack Thantos is thrown to the floor.

"You think I'll die that easily?" Thantos asks with malice in his voice, "I'm just getting started!" He stands and takes to the air with his wings.

"Nope!" Jon yells as a gust of wind knocks the demon out of the air.

"Your friends are strong," Thantos admits as he regains his footing, "But you couldn't defeat me without their help!"

"Guy! Stop!" You yell to the group, "He wants to take me on by myself. I think we can show him at least a little mercy." Everyone takes a step back as the angel lunges forward. You step to the side and pull the rifle up behind him.

"This still is an unfair battle, I say we only use weapons of bronze! I'll even give you the specibus of choice."

"I choose a scythe!"

"A schythe? As in a farmer's tool? Why?"

"I think it's befitting for someone who takes the life of others to use a scythe."

"Alright! I give you a scythe of bronze and the scythe-kind specibus." He is true to his word and gives you both. "Now! Let us do battle!"

He lunges forward once more and you once again dodge to the side. This time he adjusts his course to move for you and you place the schythe in front of you. He makes a slash with his sword and hits the weapon against your own. In this opening you make a quick kick to the head of the enemy.

"I cannot lose to such a weak being!" He yells, "I refuse defeat at your hands!"

"I agree, only a weakling would fail to win a fair battle! So maybe you should have lost the first time, and stayed down!" You advance and slash with your weapon, he guards and you swipe with your foot and he falls to the ground.

"Wait! Wait! Please don't kill me! I'll give you power! Emmense power, wealth, even women!"

"Who do you think I am? Someone who believes in the scared yelps of a coward? You die today! This is the day I claim my inheritance!" You bring the scythe down through his head and he falls still.

"Fine!" You hear Thantos's voice in your mind, "I am forced to accept defeat, I will give you your reward for defeating me. I knew this day was coming, so I have left your reward in a display case in the observatory."

"Come on!" You yell to your friends, "Looks like today's my birthday!"

Tge seven of you wonder the building until you come across a room that protrudes from the building and has the three outer walls and ceiling made of glass. In the center of the room sits a glass case with a black staff incised within.

"This is a weapon I personally crafted. It resembles the weapon your friends uses. The Monado as he called it? While the staff is simple in design it can turn the user's desires into temporary realities. It will take the form of whatever weapon the user chooses. My soul is now bound to this weapon, use it wisely."

"What's it called?"

"It has no determined name. I simply referred to it as the weapon of my successor."

"Then I shall deem it The Reaper's Crown."

"Why?"

"Because it has gone from owner to successor, much like a royal crown. Except it's like the crown that decides who's the god of death to come.

"I think that will serve as a perfect name, wield it bravely, my successor."

"What's this thing?" Nate asks as he pokes at it with his staff.

"This is what I receive as a reward for defeating my denizen."

"What is it though?"

"It's a weapon." You pick it up and it begins to feel warm in your hands. Without warning a blade emerges from the side of the staff. It's a scythe of stainless steel. A weapon befitting a god of destruction.

"Come on guys. We're done here."

END OF CHAPTER 30


	31. Master of the Time Orchard!

You are now Sam. You've now grown tired of celebrating Sam day and have headed to new regions of the dream bubbles.

You don't understand why your sister is so upset about your session being the product of a scratch. Then again the anger may stem from her father, (Your other clone dad? Paradoxes are confusing.) it's reasonable to be a little mad at someone who killed all their friends then lied to you about what was ahead. Kinda like a bus driver saying everything will be fine And you'll get there on time, when he knows damn well that the road ahead takes a huge fucking detour.

The prospect of kid-dads honestly interests you. The fact that there can be a copy of the same person that was known to you as your father and then they're not your father in any way at the same time. Paradox space is a bit crazy sometimes. Then again time and space aren't your domains, you probably just can't grasp the idea fully without dominion over the aspect, or a great understanding of it.

You continue to walk through the bubbles until someone stops you.

"Hey," The man says.

"Hi. What do you want?" You ask.

"I want to speak to my family," the man replies, "Is that reason enough?"

"Oh shit! You're my kid-dad!"

"Umm...yeah. What's with the term kid-dad?"

"Well, you're the same as my dad, but not an adult. So kid-dad."

"Actually, I'm also your son."

"I am kid-dad to my kid-dad, fuck yeah!"

"Wow, you're taking this surprisingly well."

"Dude, I don't honestly give two shits how we're related. We're just two people who share similar genetics. You can't honestly just refer to somone you've never met as true family."

"But you just fucking called me kid-dad."

"Because I don't know what else to call you."

"Call me Nate."

"Cool, I'm Sam."

"Dude, I know your name."

"Well now I'm just at a disadvantage in this conversation."

"I guess so."

"So do you have my dad's memories?"

"Yeah, and my memories from the session that created yours."

"Oh, dude, I wanna hear about that session!"

"Shouldn't I be guiding you spiritually or something?"

"Dude, I don't need any spiritual guidance. I am cool enough as it is."

"When did you become such a self-centered asshole?"

"When I god-tiered. Once I got a fuck-load of power I realized that I am pretty awesome."

"Wow, that's the wrong thing you're supposed to learn when you become immortal."

"Oh yeah? Then what was I supposed to learn?"

"I don't know! Some shit about being benevolent and kind."

"Dude, fuck that, I am a vengeful god."

"You know I expected more from my dad but I wouldn't expect anything else to come from you as my son."

"Thanks dad!"

"That wasn't a compliment."

"Don't care, mentally marking it as a compliment."

"Do you want to learn about my session or not?"

"I wanna learn stuff about dead people!,

"Then shut up and listen. Our session was a doomed one from the start. We came from a doomed timeline, we were all destined to die eventually. Jeremy and Brandon both knew this by the time they reached god-tier. In light of their situation the two of them agreed to not tell anyone, they had a goal. Brandon saw our demise and decided that it was unavoidable. What he couldn't see was a doomed timeline that had scratched. Jeremy saw the alpha timeline and six players from another session joining them. Jeremy looked deeper into your session and found that you were the product of a scratch, our scratch."

"Wait wait wait! So you guys knew to scratch the session because one of you saw the result of this action, which then caused them to commit it in the first place?"

"Yeah, and you created yourself in a cloning lab."

"Fair point, continue."

"With the knowledge that they needed to scratch to create your session they went on with the game. The two of them waited until it was time to fight the black king. They scratched the session and detonated the tumor. They made sure to leave messages for the one they decided was most attached to their father. They decided on the spoiled little girl. They picked her because she was not only attached to her father, but also gullible and she had say in your group. It was an easy choice really. Try and convince one of the more iron-willed members of your team, or break the weakest point in the chain."

"She's not weak. I know my sister, she's gullible, she thinks that the world is a fairy tale and that everyone gets some happy ending to their story, she's got less of a grasp on reality than an insane 90-year-old dementia patient, but she is not weak."

"Since when did you become so protective of her? What's with the sudden anger just because I explained their reasoning?"

"Because she's my sister dammit! I'm her family and I'm gonna stand up for her!"

"I stand corrected. You might just make it as a god with ideals like those."

"Is the story over? If so then I'm gone."

"Not quite yet. Do you know how doomed timelines work?"

"No, and I don't much care."

"They're all their own universe, each begins at the same point and there are billions in existence based off of the choices of the people in them. Only one timeline in a chain can be the alpha timeline, but what if there was say...another chain? One that on the outside looks the same as the other, but it's vastly different once you get a better look. What do you think this would be?"

"Some chains that look alike."

"No, the chains are timelines. There is no single "right timeline" there is only a path that is set out for one timeline, any versions of this timeline that deviate are therefore doomed. Imagine it like a tree as another analogy. The tree starts at the bottom, but as you go up it branches off into branches, each of these branches carries the seed that can be planted to form another tree. So let's say that one tree represents a timeline. If a seed is taken from the tree and planted elsewhere, a new timeline begins where that first timeline changed something. These timelines exist without knowledge of one another, and without each other's input. They continue to grow and eventually they both grow fruit once again."

"What kind of fruit?"

"Really? I'm explaining some intense theoretical shit here and you're concerned with what type of fruit grows into a timeline tree?"

"Yeah."

"Fine, let's say apples, you happy now?"

"Yeah, please continue."

"As both have sprouted fruit they each drop the fruit and it hits the ground. Then the all mighty time farmer goes to check on his time-apple orchard, he takes some of the fruits for himself and allows others to grow into new time trees. The ones he takes are doomed apples, he eats them because if he planted all the timelines, they would spawn too fucking many universes, so mighty time farmer decides that eating them would both make him less hungry, and also limit the overflow of time trees in his great universe orchard."

"So everyone in those universes is doomed because they got eaten by the mighty time farmer?"

"Sure, why not. The point is that because a timeline spawns another timeline doesn't mean it's destined to be destroyed. It means that they didn't make it. Each branch of the tree can be determined as a timeline, and each tree a universe, each fruit an even smaller timeline clinging to the time tree. These timelines are ones that have a chance to succeed. If one of those time apples makes it then that means that they have either made a decision and split from the main timeline to create a new alternate reality, or the inhabitants have won a game a Sburb, meaning that they created a new tree completely different from their own."

"I barely understood any of that but I'll take your word for it."

"Why do I bother explaining this shit? Here, one timeline makes a bunch of other stable timelines and also a bunch of doomed ones. The stable ones can make more stable or doomed timelines. Got it?"

"Oh yeah, that makes sense, I don't know why you had to explain it in the way of weird ass time trees."

"I honestly can't believe that you are genetically the same as my father. Just how can there be that much of an IQ jump?"

"I kinda lost a few of my marbles in the game session."

"I can see that."

"Anyway, I've got places to be."

"Where? You're asleep."

"I've been challenged by another sleeping swordsman."

"Another sleeping swordsman? Alex?"

"That's the void guy's name?"

"Yeah, and you're gonna get your ass kicked."

"Yeah yeah, see ya later Nate."

END OF CHAPTER 31


	32. Chapter 437 (I fucking said I would)

Thousands of of years in the future...

"The world is a vast place."

"Yes, it is indeed."

"And out of the vastness of the cosmos this world was born. This world is what we all envisioned. A perfect world for our creations."

"A perfect world, huh?"

"It's a combined effort of what we all dreamed for, what we all fought for, what some of us...what some of...died for."

"I'm sorry. I kinda feel guilty."

"You shouldn't feel guilty. I'm sure he would be happy with what your world has become."

"I'm glad that your friend wasn't sacrificed in vain."

"I called you here for a reason."

"What is it? It must be important to have me called to the home of the gods."

"I wanted to tell my current messenger to that world that it's going to have to survive without me. I'm leaving."

"What! But why? You've always been kind to us! Why must you leave us alone?"

"You're not going to be alone, the others will watch over you. Besides, you people must learn to live without us."

"I understand, but how can we be fine with one of our gods leaving us?"

"I don't expect you to be fine with it, I expect you to be the messenger of my will. You are the bearer of bad news."

"But what about the council? What will it do without one of the key elements?"

"That's why I want you to form another council. Your king will be able to help. You are to form the Council of the Fallen. You are to take up the symbols of those who have fallen and those who will fall."

"So you're all eventually going to leave us?"

"Immortality has its flaws. If any of us die of a just or heroic death then we stay dead."

"I see, well then, I will make this council and I will never forget all that you have done for us."

"If you wish to show thanks to me then simply show it by living. Now, I resend my mark, you will no longer bear that symbol on your hand."

"Feels strange to no longer wear that symbol on my hand. But, wait! Where will you go?"

"I don't know, but I do know it's back to the place where this world was created, back to Sburb."

"What? I've never heard of this."

"It was where we all came together and realized our true potential, where we became gods, and also...where our species died out."

"But there are still the gods here."

"They are the last known survivors of the human race. There might be more out there, but we might never find them. That's why I'm leaving, to try and find hope for our people. If I can't find survivors then I'll make another world. I just don't want us to be the last of our people."

"I'm sure you'll do great things."

"Goodbye, Daya. I hope you have a good life."

"Thank you, goodbye, my lady."


	33. Snakes, Church, and Alcoholism

You are now Mark, captain of le stars and shit. As captain of le stars and shit you have been tinkering with the frog cloning lab thing. Sadly you know absolutely nothing about cloning frogs and decide to go back to plan B: calling the Skype group like five times in a row until someone picks up to talk to you, or tells you to stop in chat.

Skype Log:

MC - Guys answer the call

NM - Why?

MC - I need help cloning frogs!

AR - Count me out I got stuff to do

JC - I can't

JC - my mom's mad at me for killing the followers at her church for free grist

BS - Isn't that shit a knight's job?

MC - Yeah, but I don't know how to get into contact with your brother

NM - I'd like to help but I'm busy with the whole raging civil war on my planet

BS - I just asked him, he doesn't want to do it. Sorry, but you're just gonna have to ask Echidna

MC - I'm gonna have to fight my way to my denizen just to make a frog?

BS - Yeah, good luck with that

MC -You said you'd help us out with our denizens because we helped you fight yours!

BS - Yeah, but I'm currently dealing with an alcoholism problem on my planet

MC - An alcoholism problem?

BS - My consorts may be addicted to alcohol my dad had somewhere in the house

MC - How much of a problem could a few drunken snakes be?

BS - Did you seriously ask that question?

BS - Also, it's not a few, they learned how to make it and now my fucking planet is a horde of shit-faced snakes!

NM - Dude is your planet just hell now?

BS - Probably, I have died and gone to hell, where I belong. There's no fire, just tons of giant drunken cobras

MC - Yeah I think I'm gonna be glad I just have cloned frogs

NM - Okay what has this turned into?

NM - We're supposed to be going on adventures and stuff becoming heroes and what is currently happening is we have become the Sburb animal control!

BS - DO YOU THINK I LIKE THE DRUNKEN SNAKES?!

BS - I've been bitten so many times I think I've suffered permanent nerve damage and I'm pumping mostly venom through my veins at the moment

BS - A doctor could try to give someone a transfusion with my blood and that guy would be killed by poisoning

NM - Well fuck that's not good

JC - Guys help I'm trapped in church

MC - Can't help frogs

BS - Can't help, snakes

AR - Can't help swordsman duel

NM - Well fuck!

NM - I guess I'm on the mission to save Jon from religion!

JC - Thanks at least they won't consume me

NM - You will be free poor child

MC - Brandon help me fight Echidna!

BS - No!

BS - If you want me to help you fight Echidna then you can wait, until then just talk to her

MC - Fine

MC - but if I need to kill her then you're gonna help me do it

BS - Dude, why would you need my help?

BS - You're a fucking page!

BS - I guarantee that killing a giant snake wouldn't be difficult for you

MC - Alright you've made your point

MC - I'll go talk to snake lady but I'm making you drag yourself out here if I have to fight her I'm not gonna waste some free support in tough fight

BS - Once again, not a tough fight for you

JC - Nathan plz save me

JC - They're gonna start reading the bible

NM - What's so bad about that?

JC - The ENTIRE BIBLE

JC - from start to finish

JC - And I can't leave

NM - I'm coming to help smol child

Skype Log End

END OF CHAPTER 33


	34. The Mage vs The Knight!

You are now Alex. You head to your bed so you can sleep and fight some guy with a sword. If that's not a weird sentence, I don't know what is.

You head to sleep and awake in the dream bubbles. You quickly walk around and find the person you are looking for. Which is fucking amazing because of how big these bubbles are.

"Hello." You greet the strange ghost.

"Sup." He replies casually. You have no idea who this is a ghost of, but you do know that there aren't any knights of rage in your session. Maybe he's from a doomed timeline where he became part of the small collective of friends in your session.

"So what are the rules of the duel?" You ask.

"Simple enough," he answers, "We may only fight using swords, use of a shield is up to you. You may kill your opponent due to us both being immortal, but try not to be brutal about it. First to either kill their opponent or make them admit defeat is the winner."

"Okay, simple enough. Let's get started."

"Okay, we will start when my friend over there," he points to a guy in a bard outfit on the edge of the ring, "finishes counting down from three."

As if on que the guy on the side of the ring begins counting, "Three! Two! One! Fight!"

As he yells the word fight you draw the Monado from your back and just manage to block an in-coming swing from his sword. As his golden blade clashes with the light of your sword sparks glow brightly as they shoot from the collision.

"Hey," he shouts to you as he jumps back, "what kinda weapon is that?"

"It's _my _weapon." You reply like any true smartass would.

"I know, but what's it called?"

"It's called the Monado Aperture."

"I thought it looked like the Monado. Good to see that you got to play that game in your world."

"It's almost as cool as a SUPRISE ATTACK!" You scream as you charge toward him with the blade and slash to only be stopped by his shield.

"See, my weapons are pretty cool too. The sword is Excalibur and the shield is the Aegis." He says before he pushes on the shield and send you back.

"Wow, dude. So unoriginal."

""What?"

"Think about it. How many times is Excalibur used in a story or show. A ton. And the Aegis isn't thinking that far out of the box either."

"Wow, rude. It took a lot of grist to make these weapons." He looks at his sword and shield with a sad look on his face.

"Don't get me wrong, they're still effective, but it's kinda in the realm of over-used gear."

"I get that for Excalibur, but how is that true for the Aegis?"

"In games they call shields and shielding powers an 'Aegis' all the time."

"Good point." He says before he charges with the shield raised.

You raise your blade and slam it into the Aegis and knock him back. "You should look into other cool swords and/or shields. Like Excalimune."

"What's Excalimune?"

"It's from a game. It's a sword that shoots fire and lightning."

"That _does_ sound pretty cool!"

"As for a shield I don't have much of an idea what to use."

"Well thanks for the help, but I'm gonna have to kill you now." He charged again, this time much faster and with his sword against the side of the shield, allowing him to attack while keeping safe behind the wall of copper and gorgon head.

"Too bad, I don't die that easily!" You dodge to the side and bring the metal of your sword down upon his blade and knock it out of his hand. In response to this he slams the shield into your chest and you fall to your knees in pain as he scrambles for the weapon he dropped.

"Well I didn't want to...but I guess I'm gonna have to start using my powers."

"Oh, if we can use powers then you're gonna lose!" You regain your footing and ready your sword.

"I'll make you eat those words!" He raises his sword and shield. He stands in a fighting stance for a few seconds and then he's gone.

"What the—" before you can finish you feel a shield slam int the side of your head. You barely manage to keep on your feet, but slide to the right a couple of feet.

"I'm the knight of rage. I have incredible strength and speed when I'm angry."

"Okay, if that's how you want to play, then I can give you a good fight." You raise your hand and feel the temperature around you drop.

"What the hell? What did you do!?"

"I'm the Mage of void, I can control nothingness and stop the existence of things around me. I'm assuming you know what makes temperature, correct?"

"What?"

"Temperature is controlled by the amount of energy the particles in the air around us have. If I get rid of some of that energy, the temperature drops, and the particles slow down. With the drop in temperature you'll become less in control, your senses will dull, and you'll tire out faster. Now I get to play the waiting game."

"Well played. But I'm not going down that easily!" He lunges toward you with his teeth chattering. You dodge to the side and he meets with a face full of dirt.

You place your blade behind his neck. "Is that all you've got? Shame I didn't get to use any cooler powers." You raise the blade, but before you can bring it down he rolls to the side and trips you.

"I'm not done yet, I won't lose that easily!"

"Actually, you will." He slams into the ground as you destroy the ground under his feet and leave him in a pit of your design.

"Fine, I surrender!"

"What! You're gonna give up just like that?"

"I can't beat someone who can destroy the ground I'm standing on."

"Wow, talk about a boring fight if it's over that quickly!"

"Alright, let's have a rematch some time then."

"Fine, what time, what place?"

"Your session, two weeks."

"What?"

"Huh, I figured you guys knew we were coming. My friends and I will be at your session in two weeks."

"Wait, you're friends with Grimm's daughter! One of my friends said that you guys were coming to our session."

"Yeah, I'm her brother, Sam. And that wonderful judge over there is Tim."

"Hey." Tim chimes in.

"Alright," you say, "I'll see you in two weeks, we can have a rematch then!"

With those words you are awoken from your sleep by Brandon.

"What are you doing in my room?" You ask.

"Dude, I have the greatest idea!" He replies.

"What?"

"We're gonna help Nate save Jon from church, but we're gonna do it the cool way."

"What's the cool way?"

"I'll explain more as we go. First, captchalog some drunk snake people!"

END OF CHAPTER 34


	35. Congrats! You're the Leader!

You are now Jon, and you can't take much more of this church service. You've been here for two books already and you don't think you can survive the boredom. A normal church service is bearable, a guy reads from the book and tells you his interpretation of it, they sing some songs, they ask for donations, but this? This is nothing but reading from one of the longest things ever written. It could be worse, they could be reading that Smash Bros. fanfic that is now the longest document in the English language.

You begin to wonder how long it will take for Nate to save you, or if he has any plan on how to save you in the first place. Suddenly the front door of the Church of the Vadicandy swings open and Nate walks in.

"Hey, I need to borrow Jon for something." He says to your mother, as if this plan might actually work.

"I'm sorry," your mother says, "but he's grounded, so he can't come with you."

"But it's something's very important."

"What does you need his help with?"

"Umm...I need his help...selling...bibles."

"Really? He was going to help you sell bibles?"

"Yeah, he was totally gonna do that!"

"I don't believe you."

"I didn't think you would."

"Really Nate?" You ask, "Of all the things that you could think of you thought she'd believe that?"

"I'm sorry! I didn't think of something to say beforehand!"

Before he can be escorted out by you displeased mother the door slams open again. It's Brandon.

"Everybody needs to get out!" Brandon shouts into the church as he runs in.

"Why is that?" Your mother asks.

"I've been looking into the lore of this world, and this church is currently sitting on top of a portal to hell!"

"What would make you say that?"

"Ancient scrolls and writings that speak of a great evil rising from a pit and destroying all around it, and signs point to that evil rising right here!"

"Well thank you for your time but that frankly just sounds too convenient for you."

"Sure, dismiss what I say now but you will regret not listening to me!"

"Please just lea—" Before she can finish her sentence a giant hole opens in the ground and snake people begin spilling out. As the snakes slithered into the church and terrified the imps and shrews that were there, a humanoid figure with red skin and horns floated up from the pit and stopped feet in the air.

"Ah, it's good to finally escape that he'll hole, ha." It said in a voice that couldn't be described as human, yet could still be understood as the English language.

Immediately your mother's face goes white and she bolts out of the church screaming in fear of the demon.

"Hahahahaha! Dude, that was fucking great!" Brandon says as he falls to his knees and continues to laugh uncontrollably.

"What just happened?" You ask, "And who's the demon?"

"What just happened is I just got you out of church, and don't worry, it's just Alex with a mask and a voice changer."

"Hey, Jon." Alex says in his demonic voice.

"Thank for getting me out of church, fam." You add.

"Well," Nate says, "now I kinda wish I got to help with the demon thing. That looked pretty cool."

"Now," Brandon says, "It's time to settle our debts."

"Settle our debts?" You ask.

"Exactly, you don't owe me anything but you owe Alex for helping you get out of church. Nate owes both of us for helping him salvage his terrible plan."

"What do you guys want us to do?" You say

"We're helping Mark with Echidna."

"Why?"

"Because if we don't he's gonna die tomorrow."

"Sounds like a good reason."

"For now sleep and get acquainted with Cherry's team."

"Wait! Who?"

"Oh, yeah! I haven't told you guys about them yet. They're some other group, from another session, that's going to be coming to our session."

"Wait, what?" Nate interjects, "So you just made this kinda decision to let them come to our game session without telling anybody?"

"Yes!" Brandon replies.

"Even though you could have just been tricked into letting a bunch of evil and/or insane people into our session where our friends, followers, and families are."

"If they prove to be dangerous then we'll kill them."

"So now we've got a group of people we need to get to know in the dream bubbles, and be prepared to have to murder them if necessary."

"Yeah, life's a bitch sometimes, but I don't think it will have to come down to us killing them. I've already made an agreement with, who I assume is, their leader."

"Wait," Alex butts in, "Didn't you break her bracelet and kinda kick her out of our session? Won't she hold a grudge for that?"

"Shit, I did do that! Well now I need to go apologize to their group leader, and also prepare for murdering them if they don't forgive me."

"Can we hold off on the murdering of strangers!" Nate says in an attempt to prevent a god-war on par with that of Norse mythology.

"Fine!" Brandon agrees, "I won't kill them. If it's an order from our leader then I guess there will be no killing today."

"When did I become the leader?"

"When you became the Prince of Mind, also you're probably the most qualified to lead."

"In what way am I just the most qualified to lead?"

"Well, I'm an asshole so I'm a terrible idea as a leader; Alex is an arsonist and we need someone who makes decisions, not infernos; Mark is a self-centered douchebag; Jon can't get his cat to listen to his orders, and Jeremy...just, no! No way in hell would I follow that piece of shit! Just no!"

"I am insulted!" Jon follows the rant.

"Anyway," Brandon continues, "You're a terrible person like the rest of us, but just kinda...not as terrible as us. We're all assholes but if there were a scale then you'd just kinda be on the section that says: "Well...he's not a _total _piece of shit."

"I'm ok with this." Nate responds.

"Anyway, we need to rest up for tomorrow, I'll convince Mark not to face Echidna without us. We'll meet at his house tomorrow."

With that you all went your separate ways and got prepared for another denizen fight.

END OF CHAPTER 35


	36. Talking To Oneself

You are now Cherry. You have no idea why, but you've been called to meet you're asshole of a father.

You enter the room of the house. You recognize this as the house where you met the even douchier version of your dad, Brandon. You see your asshole, ghost dad sitting at the table with douchebag kid-dad sitting in front of him. "Why are you here?" You ask in a hostile voice.

"I got called here to talk to captain asshat." Brandon answers, "Wait, weren't you trying to find him?"

"Yeah, already found him. He's not a very good father, and neither are you."

"What is she talking about?"

"Simple," Grimm responds, "She's your daughter."

"Shit," Brandon mutters, "That means I'm the same person as you?" He asks with a distressed look as he points to Grimm.

"Yes, we are the same person."

"Damn, I become an asshole in the future."

"Nope, not time travel."

"Scratch session?"

"Yes."

"Fuck! I don't want to have to scratch my session!"

"Scratch session of a doomed timeline."

"How the fuck would that even work?"

"The 1% Divergence Barrier."

"What does anime have to do with this?"

"It's not about the show, it's about its ideas of time. They're dead on."

"So what? Because they're a full point off on the time-grid then they don't end up doomed?"

"Yes."

"Hold on!" You yell at them, "What the hell are you guys talking about? What's this 'divergence barrier' and how does this explain everything to you people?"

"Oh," Brandon begins to respond, "I'll explain. To put it simply if you were to take all timelines and measure them on a grid, they would start with a number, point whatever, so for example: 1.23456. The decimals are each a change in a timeline. For example, world 1.000 is different from world 1.001 even though you may not see it at first. The 1% Divergence Barrier is the difference so great that it changes the whole number in a timeline. A change so big that you go from world 1.000 to world 2.000."

"What does that mean exactly?" You ask what probably seems like a stupid question to them.

"To put it simply it's a change so massive that the world is set on a completely different course than it was before the change. This type of change only occurs during major events. These events are usually things like wars, or major inventions, of course the end of the planet's inhabitants is a big enough event to warrant this kind of change."

"I still don't get it."

"Under this theory that douchy adult me is proposing, your session is on the opposite end of this major change. That's why there are doomed timelines and stable timelines. A stable timeline would be a changeable whole number with set decimal numbers. Anything that shares the exact same numbers after the decimal would be stable, anything else would be a doomed timeline of the closest stable timeline."

"So what if I'm undertstanding this it means that there can be lots of different sessions from the same planet?"

"Well, yes...kinda. It would be the same planet but in a universe so different you wouldn't be able to tell."

"Got it!"

"Good, now why are we all here?"

"Well," Grimm begins another explanation, "we're all here for a little family bonding!"

"Fuck that!" Brandon declares.

"What do you mean 'fuck that'?"

"I'm not doing any family bonding with you, Captain Douchebag. I don't need to know any more about myself, I'm not as self-absorbed as Mark. I frankly don't give a shit about you as a person."

"Wouldn't you like to know what would happen if you grew up to live a full life on Earth?"

"Raised by grandpa? No. I am fairly sure that it ended up very similar to her as an adult raised by that man." He indicates to you when he says "her", "I become boring parent with a middle-class job and a love-less marriage, if I was actually able to convince someone to marry me."

"You were able to get a wife, and everything you just said was pretty dead on."

"See? I know myself well enough, I don't need a soul searching bullshit fest."

"Wait, I want to know about myself as an adult!" You proclaim.

"Oh, no problem." Brandon begins to explain, "Imagine him/me, but female, looks like you, and is a racist."

"What? I was racist? Damn, I'm starting to not like adult me."

"As well you shouldn't, adult versions of ourselves are the same as us, but raised in shittier times with more crushed dreams."

"Wow, that's depressing."

"Anyway," Grimm continues, "the whole point of this meeting is for you two to get to know each other as you'll be entering the same universe soon."

"We've already met." You explain.

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah, and no matter which version of you you are, you're an asshole."

"But you two meeting already ruins the whole big reveal and heartfelt talk between mother and son/father and daughter!"

"That sounds fucking stupid." Brandon declares as he leans his head back over the arch of his chair and groans with boredom.

"Don't be rude to other you!" You yell at him.

"No. I can do what I want as you have no actual authority over me based off of genetics alone."

"Why are you such a piece of shit?"

"Umm, blame my parents."

"So it's my fault?"

"Nah, I'd really blame my father for taking all my aspirations and just crushing them under his boot."

"What kind of terrible person did adult me marry?"

"Someone who has no idea how to raise a child. My father is the embodiment of anger."

"Could it really be that bad?"

"Once my brother woke him up in the middle of the night by being too loud, so he punched a hole in the wall."

"What? That sounds like someone who's overly violent."

"My father is the only person I could think of who would never teach their child the basics of how a computer works then get mad at the child for not understanding how to build one."

"Wow, adult me married an asshole!"

"Yes, yes she did. What about your mom? What kinda person did this asshole marry?" He asks as he motions to Grimm.

"My mom was the greatest! She was caring and nice, the pinnacle of what a mother should be!"

"Bullshit! I refuse to believe that any version of me could land that kind of catch! Have you seen how much of an asshole I am? Was she evil? Was she a demon? Did he sell his soul to the wife demon for a wife?

"No, I frankly don't know how this asshole of a father got such a good wife."

"What did you do Grimm? Brainwashing? Did you luck out on an arranged marriage? Sell your non-existent soul to the devil as I said before?"

"No!" Grimm replies angrily, "Do you honestly beleive I am incapable of getting a lovely wife who is also a terrific mother?"

"Well..." Brandon continues, "Seeing as I'm you, yes I very highly doubt that. Have you talked to yourself? Well now you have and if you've been speaking with me this long then you can understand how I doubt the legitimacy of this story."

"Wow, I just can't win! Yes, I actually did convince someone to marry me without the use of petty tricks of games."

"What's the catch?"

"Why do you think there's a catch?"

"Because there is! I know for a fact that there had to be something that led a perfectly normal person to see a huge asshole and go, 'Oh, great husband material!'."

"She was a perfectly normal person."

"I don't care, I'm still gonna choose to believe you sold your soul."

"Shut up about selling souls, that's the dumbest thing ever be ever heard!" You declare to the two pieces of shit in front of you.

"Yes, let's do that!" Brandon says.

"Cool, let's talk about how I'm leaving and not talking to you assholes!"

"Wow, someone's a little salty about the bracelet."

"Yeah, I am! I don't appreciate my things being destroyed!"

"Sorry about that but it was a necessity."

"Really? Being an asshole and destroying my things is a necessity?"

"No. You not being in the session is a necessity. I can't let the team get weak."

"What do you mean by get weak? Do you think I'm going to make your team weaker? As if I'm some kind of hinderence."

"No, it's because you're too powerful as a healer."

"Wow, that's the biggest lie I've ever heard. Saying that you didn't want someone's help because they'd do the job too well."

"No, it's not about doing a job or anything, it's because you're an incredibly powerful healer. We don't need a bunch of gods who can expect for their lives to be saved every time they get in trouble."

"I'm going to end up in the same universe as you guys anyway. What does it matter?"

"It matters plenty. If I let my team grow into a group of weakilings who can't pull their own weight, then who's to say that some other threat couldn't defeat us. Who's to say that there won't be other gods, ones who are more powerful, who know how to work as a team."

"Why would there be other gods?"

"It's not a matter of other gods appearing, I'm preparing us for the event that our friendships will fade, and in that place hatred will form."

"Wait, you're preparing your friends for if they have to kill each other?!"

"I am, humans are terrible creatures. We lie, we cheat, we steal, humans betray the gifts given to them by whatever created us. We are evil at our core, and I can't deny that my friends and I are like this as well. If one of us turns, tries to destroy the others, tries to stop what we worked so hard to create, then the others are gonna have to put them down."

"You say this like humans are animals, like they can just be put down when they get a bum leg, or make a mistake."

"Humans _are_ animals, every religion in the world shows this. Every belief system with the exception of Confucianism will show you this. Humans have always been animals, and they always will be. I detest humans, I'm glad we destroyed Earth."

"What!? How can you say that?! Humans have come so far as civilization, we've built the pyramids and the Statue of Liberty. We created great empires and wonderful thinkers! Humans have achieved so much!"

"Humans have only grown by killing one another. Humans built the pyramids on the bones of the fallen slaves who labored on them, those empires were founded by the destruction of others, and those thinkers unknowingly created the weapons to destroy human life that those groups used."

"So what if they did? So what if they made mistakes, can't they be forgiven?"

"No!" This was not only said by Brandon, but also by Grimm.

"Humans also can't survive without other humans, what if you destroy each other entirely? What if you kill out humanity by trying to destroy its faults?"

"Then that would be one less stain on the fabric of history. Sadly that stain still remains, until it's completely removed from the fabric it rests on."

"What?"

"I'm saying that the only way humanity can be forgiven, is for it to die out."

"What's wrong with you?"

"I'm a realist. The world isn't all sunshine and rainbows, you should know that."

"Don't try and push your beliefs on me!"

"I'm not trying to, I'm stating my beliefs, and the facts amongst them. If I wanted the whole world to think like me, then I'd make a world where I was the only person. I appreciate input from others, if it has an intelligent backup."

"So if I could convince you humanity was good, then you'd accept it?"

"Yes, but I doubt you could do that."

"I guess you're just a lost cause, just like this piece of shit is!" You say as you point at Grimm.

"Really?" Grimm asks, "You're still holding a grudge, Sakura?"

"I hate that name, and yes I'm still angry!"

"Wow, you fucking weeb!" Brandon says to Grimm.

"What?" He looks at Brandon confused.

"Bro, kid-you was a weeb, and adult you fucking was one!"

"I know what a weeb is, but adult me wasn't one."

"No, you weren't a weeb, you only named your daughter common Japanese name A."

"It's 'cause I found her on a buisness trip to Japan. I took her to the nearest hospital and she got the name as a placeholder until we found no her parents. No parents were found for her, so I took her home."

"Yes, attempt to hide the weeb, but I still know!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" You ask.

"Nothing." They reply in unison.

"Bullshit! I came all the way out here, abandoned an entire universe to just sort it's own shit out to find my father, and _this_ is what I find?"

"What?" Brandon asks as he looks at you with a strange face.

"You are a sociopath! You are literally arguing with yourself right now! Do you know how fucking crazy that makes you? My father, the man I used to look up to is a fucking sociopath who argues with himself!"

"You'd do the exact same thing over n this situation."

"No! I'd understand how other me thinks and feels, then move the fuck on!"

"No, because once you talk it out, and older version of yourself will hate that you're on a path to mistakes they made; you will hate them for trying to order you around, when they really are trying to help. Nobody truly understands themself."

"So you have full understanding of what is happening here and still choose to argue?"

"No. I in no way have full understanding of this situation. I can think and ponder and compare it to what I know, but this is still completely incomprehensible. I don't fucking know what my life has become. I was just doing my thing, living life, now I'm gonna become death, I have a mom-daughter, and I'm arguing with older me. I might just have gone crazy."

"How can you act so calm about this then?"

"Because I've just stopped giving a shit. The amount of total shits given about anything has hit a total of zero."

"I don't even know how to respond to that."

"I'd suggest just leaving, because this is already a way too fucked up conversation. The second I started talking to adult me this became absolute bullshit."

"Fine, I'll leave. I'm just done with this."

"Good, I am too. I should also add, avoid talking with people from my session, we can speak once you arrive, but talking in the dream bubbles only complicates things and results in more of these bullshit conversations."

"I'll do as I please!"

"Cool, I honestly don't care. I'm gonna continue to murder things in my session now."

"Asshole." You mutter. You wake up in the spaceship.

END OF CHAPTER 36

* * *

Hey, remember when this piece of shit was updated last? Neither do I! This is the author and I just wanted to tell you that I could have been writing this but I had actual shit to do! I also know that there are probably only like 4 people who read this so have fun with this hastily finished chapter that I wrote half of in one month and the other half at 1AM because I got bored!

Fuck this story, it's absolute shit but you will probably keep reading,

\- The High King of Dralk


	37. Fire and Lightning

You are now Mark. You prepare to enter the eighth gate and battle your denizen. As you enter you find yourself at the entrance to a great cavern. The entrance marked by great stalagmites and stalactites, making the cave look like the mouth of a great beast.

As as you walk forward you notice the sound, or rather the complete lack of sound. The only thing to greet you in the darkness is the echoing sound of your own footsteps. You reach a great door with the likeness of a serpent etched into it. The wooden body of the door being clung to by the great metallic animal. You push the great door open and it swings with a creak that resonates through the blackness.

The room behind the door is dimly lit by flames along the wall, not torches, literal fucking flames just coming out of the walls. In the center of the room sits the great serpent, Echidna. The Greek mother of monsters, this is your new master, and she is going to make you learn the meaning of pain.

"Why have you come to me child?" She hisses out from her silver, scaled lips as her forked toung extends and retracts at regular intervals.

"I want you to release the genesis frog."

"I can't do that, little one. You and your friends aren't ready."

"But I need the genesis frog!"

"You and your friends can't be trusted with it. It will die before it can mature."

"We can handle it. I'm not leaving without the frog!"

"Why do you want the frog so much?"

"Because we need to get out of here. If we don't leave fast then I don't think we might leave at all."

"Why don't you ask one of your psychics about it? The can see the future."

"I still can't take the chance that they don't see it coming. I need the frog, I won't leave without it!"

"I'll make you a deal. If you defeat me, then you can take the frog."

"Can't I make another deal here?"

"No, now battle, or leave."

"Then I guess I'll battle."

The second you said the word battle she lunged at you with a hiss. You recoil back and prepare for your death, suddenly a great golden flash appears before you and you hear someone yell "SHIELD!" Standing before you is Alex holding his Monado in front of him as he is surrounded by a golden light.

"Alex?" You ask as you look up at your friend.

"Hey! I got your back!" He replies simply.

"Get the hell up!" A familiar voice says. It's Brandon.

"Don't have to tell me twice." You reply.

"Here's the plan." Nate begins as he marches forward, "Giant snake lady needs to die. We kill her. Mark learns some shit about himself, and we get closer to leaving this place. Let's go."

"Why are we even helping past the point of not of saving his life?" Brandon asks, "He's a fucking Page of Space. He should have enough power to destroy Echidna easily."

"I don't really have that much ch power." You admit, "I god-tiered, but I'm still pretty weak. I didn't even notice a change."

"Bullshit! You're a page, and you're facing the fault of every page, self-doubt. A page faces the self and goes 'Wow, I suck.' Then fights some stuff, builds a fucking ego, then goes 'Dude, I fucking rock!' Now we're gonna go ahead and hope you can skip the sucking part and move on to killing shit. We may make fun of you and seem to put you down, but that just means you need to come back twice as strong! If the world takes a bite out of you then you bite back! You take a chunk out of the world so big it won't ever think of fucking with you again! Now go kill that fucking snake!"

He's right, he could have phrased it in a better way, but he's right. This snake monster thinks you're weak, so you're damn well gonna show it that if anything _it's_ weak, your power is great and you're gonna show it off.

You raise your arms and imagine something, you imagine the walls sprouting great spikes that impale Echidna, and it comes true.

"Dude, you gotta think bigger than that!" Nate adds, "You control space, as in all matter. You control solids, liquids, even plasmas, use them.

Plasmas? You think. Plasmas are things like fire and electricity right? How do fires start again? Yeah the shit in the environment starts to mix with oxygen, fire starts, shit burns. You gather all the hydrogen in the room around Echidna, separate the molecules, then combine them with oxygen.

Echidna ignites and and screams in pain as she burns. Sadly, the snake monster lives and begins to scream at you, "How _dare_ you burn me, I will end you! I will never let you have the frog!"

Well fire worked, but how does lightening work again? Opposites charges attract. What if you just charged her with positive energy and charged the air around her with negative charges? You try it, and suddenly the snake flashes brightly and you hear a great crack as the charges connect.

You look up at the aftermath to see a charred snake. What have you done? It was just supposed to be a fight to see who would surrender, but you killed her. You look at what you've done with horror, what your power can do.

"Don't get to caught up on it." Brandon says, "The two things people can't escape are death and taxes. You did what you had to."

"I don't think I had to kill her!" You respond quietly.

"If you didn't I would have, and you know it. Besides, you need the courage to kill if you want to make it as a god. Gods create and destroy all the time, we'll be no different."

"But that's cruel, to just create something that can think and feel, then end it all because you messed one part up."

"Yep, humans are cruel, gods are cruel. Everything that has free will will become cruel at some point. That's just the way things are."

"That's a terrible mentality."

"If it makes you feel better, I'm the one who has to do the ending, so you can just create to your hearts content, and I handle the inevitable."

"I'm not sure if that helps."

"Whatever, let's get the frog and leave."

You head deeper in the cave and find the frog in a kind of stasis. You also find a fist-kind strife card. You equip it and the weapon you found with it, The Universal Game Glove. It pretty much looks exactly like a Nintendo Power Glove, but it actually works for the purpose it was designed, it helps you tune your control of matter.

END OF CHAPTER 37


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